Anxiety about reduced movements

[CatOnBlanky]

I'm currently 19 weeks pregnant with my second baby and know I'm soon going to be at the stage where I'm feeling regular movement (I get the odd kick at the moment but nothing regular yet). I should be looking forward to this but I'm dreading it. I have terrible anxiety anyway and with my first baby the whole "watch out for reduced movement" thing was an absolute nightmare because I was constantly overanalysing it and I don't think he ever settled into a recognisable pattern, so I had no idea what even counted as "reduced movement". I think I was at the hospital literally once a week for weeks in a row by the end because all the advice is you should always get checked out. He was always fine. Back then I lived in London and it was very easy for me to get to the hospital. Now I live quite far away from the hospital in another city with crap public transport and I don't drive (can't for medical reasons and almost certainly won't ever be able to, so please don't come at me about that!), so any time I want to go in to be checked I will have to either get an (expensive) taxi or get my DH to drive me if he's WFH.

How can I work out what actually is reduced movement and what isn't? When you have anxiety it's no good saying stuff like "trust your gut", because my gut always tells me something terrible is about to happen.

[Mrsttcno1]

Hi OP, I’m due in a few weeks with my first baby and this was something I also struggled to wrap my head around. Everybody says “you’ll just know” but I always found that a bit mad when it’s something so important and my first time ever experiencing it!

The actual guidance on reduced movements is that if you don’t feel 10 movements in 2 hours then you should go get checked out, this applies after week 28 of pregnancy as before that it can be totally normal for baby not to have a pattern. They say if you’re worrying about it then lie down completely still for 2 hours and really focus on any movement.

The other thing though as I’ve learned is that once they are in an established pattern it can be quite obvious when there are reduced movements. My baby is very very active, from 28 weeks she has always been kicking when I wake up, kicks and wriggles for about an hour after I eat breakfast, when I get in the bath, when I have a cold fizzy drink etc she moves, so if you really pay attention to your baby’s “routine” then you can quickly spot when things change. For example last Monday I woke up and couldn’t feel her moving, I had breakfast and still nothing, so I then went through the whole roster of things that usually make her move- food, cold drink, bath, a walk, when none of that worked I rang triage and went in to be checked, all fine, but that was unusual for her and because I’ve paid close attention throughout to her movements I knew that wasn’t normal. X

[CatOnBlanky]

My first baby never had any kind of pattern. He was sometimes really quiet and sometimes really active. Sometimes awake all night, sometimes awake all day. It was totally and utterly random!

[Barkybarkynutnut]

Do u generally struggle with anxiety? This is a very worrying time for you. Could you make contact with your midwife to seek reassurance? Too much googling can send you insane. Could you reach out to a health professional in real life?

[CatOnBlanky]

Yes, I've had anxiety my whole life. I'm being well treated for it. I simply struggle with knowing what I actually need to worry about WRT reduced movements. I really don't want to be at the hospital every week like I was the first time.