I don’t know if I can afford this baby

[user1494157537]

Hi all, I’ve fairly recently discovered I’m pregnant. The baby’s father has made it clear he wants nothing to do with it or me. He is due to move abroad for work very soon.

I don’t know how I’m going to be able to afford it. At first I thought we’d be ok as I am on what I thought was a pretty good wage (£60k) and own my own (very small) 2 bedroom flat.

I live in central London and my mortgage is currently £700pcm but I used help to buy so that will go up to c.£1200-1300pcm in a year. I’m in negative equity as the value has dropped and so I can’t afford to sell and buy somewhere cheaper.

I’ve just started to find out about nursery fees though. They are extortionate. I only get SMP with my job and the nursery’s which have fees online are as much as £90-100 a day. Most don’t have fees up. (If anyone knows Canary Wharf baby feed please let me know!)

I have some savings but only a couple of months worth and just can’t see how I can afford to work and pay for childcare. It seems very unfair that a couple on £49K each would get help but I’m not able to get anything.

Has anyone been in a similar situation and how have you managed? Please help, I’m getting a bit desperate. I’ve always wanted to be a mum but can’t see how on earth I can afford it.

[Burpalot]

I was in your position on your salary op pregnant by a similar sort of man and decided I didn't want a child under those circumstances. Struggling, single, away from family. Good luck, it's really hard.

Re renting your flat out. There are sometimes special circumstances and you can ask for permission. Maybe try that. Or just let it out and don't tell anyone. Put yourself first

[Bunkbedpeople]

Lodger or Airbnb

Seriously any spare cupboard in central London is a goldmine. Look at local ads for similar places and the figures will make your income/outgoing balance change drastically

[MidnightCitrus]

**announce

[MidnightCitrus]

[quote Limehouser]@user1494157537 I have pm'd you.[/quote]
its not an airport, you don't need to annouce it

[Limehouser]

@user1494157537 I have pm'd you.

[coffeeforone]

Also agree double check the help to buy figures - £500 a month doesn't seem right. We have a HTB loan amount of 110k and the monthly payments will start next year at only £160 per month. Even if you had a double loan of £220k (almost the max for London HTB), then it's nowhere near £500 a month...

[unicornsarereal72]

Hahaha.
CMS aren't going to magic up any money sadly. They have no power over those employed in other countries.

They have little power over those who work in this country as my arrears currently stand at about £9k. With no sight of me seeing a penny anytime soon

You will cope. Cut back on non essentials. Plan your food shop. And look for local child minders ASAP and get your name down. Good luck.

[Embracelife]

But get a lodger now op
You ll find a way to manage
You dont need the most expensive buggy etc

[Embracelife]

Sorry up to 600k
40% Government equity loan- interest free for the first 5 yearsAvailable on new build homes up to £600,000

40% is 240k

So if op maxed out then htb loan part is huge
So doesn't surprise that it adds 500 a month

[Embracelife]

In London htb is up to 40% of the value.
So a 2 bed was probably 500 k and htb loan was 40% I.e. 200k....
Htb in London is going to hit people hard

[Heyhih3]

@parentofteen

Are you 100% sure that your payments will go up to £1200 when your 5 year period ends? That just doesn't seem right to me - you only repay interest, not interest and the capital. I was paying £40 a month interest on £28k.

How much did you borrow under H2B?

(Previous H2B-er here)

I know it’s an awful lot! OP should double check this...

[HathorX]

Hi, just wanted to add that most gyms will let you defer a year if you're pregnant. Definitely worth asking if they won't let you cancel.

[parentofteen]

Are you 100% sure that your payments will go up to £1200 when your 5 year period ends? That just doesn't seem right to me - you only repay interest, not interest and the capital. I was paying £40 a month interest on £28k.

How much did you borrow under H2B?

(Previous H2B-er here)

[Ishouldtryabiteachdaytime]

A small double would be fine for a single lodger ( it's just a bit larger than a single bed. ) And you then get a next to me crib or space saver cot to go next to your bed. You can't sleep a baby in a spectate room until six months anyway.

Ideally get a mon- fri lodger.

I also agree cut expenses like Sky, Netflix's and Gyms

I also don't get why your help to buy makes you're mortgage more? You have to start payments on the help to buy part, but why are they £500 a month ? Are you shared ownership ?

[PennyRoyal]

@Wolfsony Wow - Bit harsh!
OP - you'll make it work, just need to juggle a bit. Babies aren't expensive and if you can perhaps suspend your pension payments, cut back where you can and you'll be fine. And it will be so worth it. Good luck and congratulations!

[Wolfsony]

Unless you're over 40 I wouldn't keep the baby. It will be miserable and you're too vulnerable with no help nor prospect of help.

[JanewaysBun]

Your issue is the mortgage.
I'm in London too, there are literally no childminders In my area as anyone with a house (all houses are 1 mil plus) won't want or need to be a CM. Cheapest nursery is 2k pm, it is what it is

Depends how much your NE is, living in Essex would be doable.

[coffeeforone]

And also it's short term the costs will reduce once child is 3 and you should get 30 hour funding which helps. Even if it means getting into debt for a few years I'd do that over giving up your job. See if you can get an interest free credit card to spend on and then save some cash.

[coffeeforone]

Tax free childcare is the best benefit you will get - it's £167 per month off your childcare so make sure you sign up for that as as soon as you can.

[Doveyouknow]

Might be worth looking at nurseries in bow / mile end as they charge less than in CW and would be straight forward to get to on the DLR / bus

[ivfdreaming]

Would you consider moving out of London? Childcare costs in London are just disgraceful - I'm currently arranging A childminder as I'm pregnant with twins and I'm currently looking at paying £35 a day per child which with tax free child care account works out less than £30 per day

I would also see if you can take a term time childcare contract which should bring the cost down - are you able to use your annual leave to cover most of the school holidays?

I'd also be telling the father he needs to pay up

[PaddingtonsHat]

If you’re in negative equity would now be a good time to take on the Help to Buy portion of your property and remortgage? Hopefully would stop mortgage costs increasing so much

[OnlyFoolsnMothers]

Luckily the government disagrees with you I didn’t say they shouldn’t- Jesus!!! I just said I didn’t understand it. I’ve learnt something

[AntiHop]

You will definitely be able to find a cheaper nursery than that.

[AnotherEmma]

Luckily the government disagrees with you and recognises women's rights to have a bare minimum of financial support during maternity leave.

I don't like it when people spread misinformation and wrong "advice" because of their own personal opinions and agenda.