What happened to your rapist ?

[Iwonder777]

Please bear with me.

I never reported mine.

He's married now, 3 boys, professional. Looks to be very happy.

Did you ever get justice?

[Iwonder777]

Thanks for sharing your stories. As hard as they are to read, they make me realise, I wasn't ever really alone with this - despite me feeling so ~ for decades 😔

[Hidingtonothing]

He lives miles away now, I check on FB every so often. His photos indicate he has a little boy but there's no sign of a partner.

He did actually apologise to me, I assume for raping me as he'd done nothing else. I was working in a local shop a few years after the event and he came in, I froze and he came up to the counter and just said 'sorry', and then left. It didn't help if I'm honest, I'd always thought it might, if he just acknowledged what he'd done, but in reality it just made me more angry.

I was only 13 when it happened and he was only 17 and I think I'd convinced myself he was too young and inexperienced to know he'd done wrong so hearing him say sorry made it worse in some ways. It told me he knew it was wrong and he did it anyway and that was worse than the excuse I'd made for him in my head. Unfortunately I also found out soon after the apology that there had been others, he'd done the same to at least 2 other girls, one before and one after me, I think that devastated me more than what happened to me.

It's all a very long time ago for me now and I would say I'm as healed as I can be but it still makes me sad, for myself and those other girls, for all of us. I hope he really was sorry, I hope he's changed and become a different person and most of all I hope he's teaching that little boy on his FB photo to be a better man than he was.

[Ereshkigalangcleg]

I don't know. I didn't report and we weren't friends after it. I hope he didn't hurt anyone else, but I worry he may have done.

[thatdarncat]

And was raped many times by my boyfriend from age 16-18. Violent and abusive relationship. This bastard lives down the road from my mum and dad with his wife and 2 kids.

[IkeaTears]

No idea. It was stranger rape.

[thatdarncat]

Didn’t report mine. Knew I would be told it was all my fault aged 15 because I was drunk. Had to see him for a year after at school where I lived in fear of him.

[UnitedRoad]

I’m not sure if the two things are connected but I don’t drink now, and haven’t since I was pregnant with my eldest (she’s 21). You know how people say alcohol takes the edge off? I really much prefer feeling in control.

I haven’t written that before or even thought it (I’ve buried quite a lot about what happened), but now I can see that that’s definitely a likely reason why I don’t drink.

[UnitedRoad]

I didn’t report mine either. The only person I told was my best friend who found me beaten up, and in shock, and then I kept the whole thing secret for nearly 20 years. I told my teen daughters as I’ve always felt to blame for what happened to me, as I was very drunk. He had been a friend of my big brother in middle school, and I went off with him because he said he’d see me home.

[Iwonder777]

Im appalled by how many of the bastards have got away. In fact I'm not appalled I'm upset 😒😞

[Acceptableinthe90s]

I’ve name changed for this.

I have been raped by 3 different men. I’ve never reported any of them.

The first when I was 15, he was 22 and had a 14 year old girlfriend who at the time was pregnant with his first child.
I was groomed by him into thinking we needed to sneak around as he was tied to that girl as her family expected him to ‘do right’ by her and the baby (by the time they split when she was 19 they had 4 children ) she of course was a victim too.

My parents friend found out and told them and they pleaded with me to end the ‘affair’ but I of course dug my heels in and stayed.

Seems back then teen girls parents didn’t report these things to the police.

He had a stroke a couple of years ago and is in a really bad way, I’m not sorry that I’m watching and waiting for him to die.

The second I was still 15, almost 16.
He was 27 and ‘saved’ me from the first guy and introduced me to his group of drug addicted/dealing men, making me believe they would protect me from him.

They acted the part well but of course were just enabling him to take advantage of me in the worst way, told me he’d recorded the sex on tape and would use it if I didn’t keep quiet.
He also had a gun which I’m not sure was real looking back (but I believed it was at the time)

I spent two years being abused by that man until I was dropped for someone new.

He’s now in and out of prison for various things, the most recent was for beating his wife

The third was my first husband.
He raped me whenever I was passed out drunk, which often was after great nights out with friends where I’d let my hair down and drank more than I’d intended (encouraged by him)
I’d always wake in the mornings and realise he’d ‘had sex with’ me but with no recollection myself.
I remember I felt it tainted the good times and felt a bit off so asked him if we could not ‘have sex’ when I’d had a drink.
It continued, it was then I told him I felt like it was rape.
He said of course it wasn’t as we were married and although I couldn’t remember, I was offering sex on a plate so why would he refuse?
That’s when I realised it WAS rape. Again.

He’s apparently happy with his new wife.

[Potayto]

Prison. Sadly, I have to live with the fact I wasn’t the woman who put him there.

[MyTearsAreOnFire]

Never reported mine either.

He is happily married to the loveliest woman ever. His life seems pretty cushty. It’s his birthday today.

I can still feel his body on mine and it happened 10 years ago

[NCjustforthis123]

@Namechange8471 - sorry, just seen your comment to me.

Thank you for caring. It won't happen again - we don't sleep together (literally) and he has no desire for sex. I will get out, somehow. Need to learn to drive first though and that requires time, money, and a heck of a lot of guts.

He's an alcoholic with a severe memory problem. He doesn't remember the incident and I don't think he believes it happened anyway. He might remember, one day.

[Lardlizard]

After watching the drama this may destroy you this has got me wondering in the best Revenge for a rapist
A dish served cold

[Iwonder777]

I can't imagine what strength it's taken to keep on keeping on. Sometimes I want to scream. It's never far away from my thoughts

[zobalina77]

I was raped more times than I can remember between the age of 9 and 14. It was my adult stepbrother. I finally went to the police about 7 years ago. It took a long time to find him as he was homeless. He pleaded not guilty at the start of the trial and I prepared myself to give evidence knowing that I was going to relive it all again. For some reason he then pleaded guilty and got 7 years. Not anywhere near enough as I have to live with what he did forever, but at least I got some justice.

[Neverforget2020]

Well, the result of my rape is about to start secondary school in September.
The most amazing, kindest, sweetest child . Shame their 'father' was an asshole.

He's now married. I've stayed single. Undergoing counselling.

[FabbyChix]

I never reported I was 18. I was sleeping with his wife he came in she held me down. No way was I reporting. He threw half a fifty pound note at me said cone back next week for other half. That was nearly 40 years ago.

[Iwonder777]

Hugs xxx

[OhamIreally]

He was convicted and got 14 years in prison.

Giving evidence at the trial was the most difficult thing I've ever done and I remind myself of that when times are hard and I feel like I can't cope.

So sorry for all of you.

[Greenforestt]

I divorced my rapist. He's playing the victim to anyone who will listen.

[Destinysdaughter]

He was sent to prison for raping someone even younger than me...

[InsideOfEmptiness]

I don't know if this even counts, but my first experience of this was my boyfriend when I was 15. We were having consensual sex, then he uttered the delightful words 'I want to fuck you up the arse' , I said no, he proceeded to do so. It hurt and I cried and felt humiliated because he had totally ignored my wishes. What happened to him? Well he's now married with three children and considered to be an upstanding pillar of the community.

Next time, I was at a festival, got a bit pissed, went back to our tent early while my friends were still at a gig. Fell asleep, woke up a few hours later with a strange man lying next to me and his fingers inside me. I jumped up, slapped him, and he ran away. The friends that I was with still don't know. Don't know what happened to him, no idea who he was and never saw him again.

[MamaLion1319]

They all live very happy lives from the outside looking in. Whilst I claw and fight my way up from rock bottom.

[Iwonder777]

Thanks for sharing your stories.
horrific. Always shocking too.