My DS is 2yr and possibly asd

[Mumofone18]

Well, where to begin. I really am struggling at the moment with being a parent. My son is 25 months old and has recently been referred to speech and language therapy (6 months waiting list-possibly more now due to current situation). I knew something wasn’t quite right when he was 16 months, went and seen my HV and she agrees and ask for a referral which was denied due to his age. I am finding it very difficult dealing with him as he is very aggressive if he doesn’t want to do something. I was wondering if anyone who is or has gone through this can offer any helpful suggestions to help me get through everyday life without having mental breakdowns.

He is basically non verbal, lots of babbling but apart from the word dad, nothing. He doesn’t point and will just grab mine or his dads hand if he wants something.

He plays constantly with trains or cars and has recently just started to lie down whilst doing this.

When he doesn’t want to do something he becomes very agitated and starts to grab out and bite. When I tell him in a firm voice ‘no, that hurts mum’ or any other variation he lashes out more so I have tried the nicer way of saying in a low calm voice, that’s not nice and sometimes it works but other times it doesn’t.

I feel like he just doesn’t like me anymore and would much prefer to spend all his time with his dad which is impossible because he works 6 days for 11 hr shifts.

I just really need advice, I just feel like a failure at the moment.

Thanks

[LivingMyBestLifeNOT]

Does he go to preschool/ nursery?

[LivingMyBestLifeNOT]

There is also PECS you could look into

[LivingMyBestLifeNOT]

Hi. I am a SENCO at a preschool. In our area they wont refer for speech and language until the age of 3.
It can be a challenging age. Could you use makaton/ visuals to help child develop social skills and wants and needs.
maybe you could introduce a first and then board... so first tidy up and then we can have a cuddle and story. Or it could be classed and as a now and next in the same way. Now and next could be used in a way that you want the child to do something on your terms so if he wants to play with cars but doesnt want to tidy up perhaps say 'first tidy then play with this truck.' so he feels like he is having a choice but its about the choices you make, if that make sense

[JaneDoe7]

More Than Words by Fern Sussman is a great book for you to work through on your own. I found it had lots of great ideas to encourage communication.

[Mumofone18]

Still in the same boat here with the little guy. Doing a lot more face to face interaction with him so he can see my expressions etc. Also imitating the things he does whilst playing to try and get a reaction from him. I feel like he looks a me a lot more to join in now which is good. I’ve also started to do a lot more musical and action singing with him which he really seems to enjoy. The tantrums are still there especially if we change our routine. I just try to remain calm and tell him it’s ok and eventually he calms down. I’m just gonna keep trying these things and hope he keeps engaging with me and then hopefully some speech will come. Anybody else had any joy with these sorts of things??

[duletty]

Sensory
Lots of crunchy snacks
Drinks
Quiet space, noise/light
Order a mini trampoline to get rid of energy
Not too much in face stuff, mirror what they do
Potty training won’t happen until they are aware they are wet and don’t like the sensation

[2beautifulbabs]

Hi Op I'm going through similar my DS is 3 years old he's obsessed with cars, non verbal we are awaiting paediatrician to asses him.
We are also due speech and language sessions but they've now been put on hold due to lockdown.
My DS was in pre school and we had funding recently in place for one to one assistance for him which was starting to work but ever since we've gone into lockdown he's gone backwards.
We are struggling to potty train him as well he's not grasping it what so ever.
He hates getting dressed and undressed just screams at us like a wild animal same when it comes to nappy changes.
He copies and sings along to his favourite Disney films but won't engage in any conversation with us just one words and even then I wonder if he fully understands what they mean.
He's a fussy eater as well I love my little boy so much but I am beyond worried and stressing myself out I just want him to get assessed so we can help him out the best we can providing him the right support.
Our DD 1 year old is starting to copy some of his behaviours because she thinks it's normal.
I just want this lockdown to lift so that we can get access again to medical professions that deal with child development

[Mumofone18]

Fingers crossed but I doubt it!! Seems like everywhere is pretty much the same nowadays.

I just wish I had some help from someone who is a professional as I pretty much feel helpless most days!!

[littleduckeggblue]

How come it's a 6 month waiting list?
I know waiting lists differ from location but 6 months seems mad.
Ours came the following week when we were referred.
Hopefully you'll get seen quicker!

[Mumofone18]

He is being referred to a speech and language therapist but it’s a 6 month waiting list so just gonna have to try my best at home with him at least until the lockdown is over then my HV has told me about a group for children with all different kinds of learning disabilities and that going along might help.

I do hope his language gets better as it would make his life so much less frustrating (and mine). It’s like he’s talking to himself and us in sentences but it’s just a load of jumbled up babbling!!

Just recently bought a set of books with lots of different vehicles in them and he seems more interested in these. He also enjoys the pop up kind of books.

I just want to engage him as much as I can, I think if I let him he would just play with his trains all day!!

[BatleyTownswomensGuild]

Firstly, temper and aggression is developmentally normal for 25 month year old kids. So it doesn't follow he will always be this way.

My son was very challenging at that age. Once the language started to come, it got easier. He is diagnosed ASD but is a fairly easy child most of the time now (he's 6).

I would talk to your GP, local children's centre or health visitor, to see if there are any speech and language programmes for late talkers in your area - once lockdown is lifted obviously.

My little boy loves trains too. Could you look through some picture books of trains together. Talking about his interests is likely to get him talking. My little boy absorbed train words like a sponge....He used the word pantograph before he could use words like tired, scared or happy! 😂

[Mumofone18]

How is your boy now?? Does he speak at all?? What words can he say?? Was it just speech that you had trouble with??

[Mummy0ftwo12]

My boy was non verbal until 3, he was very frustrated at not being able to communicate so we started with makaton and a now/next board.