Working from home

[strawberrylaces29]

Can someone advice what my options are - if any

Work for a company where I have been told I can work from home - my boss was never a fan of this but hasn't a choice atm

I have a lo who I thought I can work and home school but that did not work

So taking more of a relaxed approach, and I'm still struggling

Last week did not go well - worked way over my hours. There's no cut off because all my set up for work is at home.

I do more work, I feel so stressed because I can't literally switch off

I know I'm lucky I have a job / income atm but I get calls / emails all over the weekend so I'm already dreading Monday
I have constant headache and I feel anxious
Let alone about what's going on in the world my stress is all my work
I'm a single mum in a flat and I just feel my work is dragging me down

I also study in the evenings so I just feel it's too much

I'm not sure what I can do / say to my boss.
People will tell me to not do so much but I know the answer will be the work has to be done.....which I should be feeling grateful for I know. I have tried.

He's the kind of boss that thinks 8 hrs work can be done in 5 kind of thing

I just want to enjoy my weekend with lo as much as I can in this horrible time at the moment but I just feel my mental health is really suffering and will continue to if I carry on

Thanks for reading x

[Isleepinahedgefund]

I gather that you’re not used to wfh?

It’s essential that you set boundaries in stone. As you have found, it’s very easy to fall into working allllllll the hours because your kit is there in front of you and/or there is pressure from others who can’t/won’t switch off.


Don’t give your boss the choice. Switch your computer on at 9, switch it off at 5 and whatever happens in between can be picked up tomorrow. Put your laptop away overnight. If you have a work phone switch it off. If you’re getting calls on personal phone ask them not to and then block/mute the number if they don’t respect it, even if just over the weekend.

Allowing home working is not an excuse to grind employees into the ground.

[strawberrylaces29]

It would be fine if I could just do my hours but it feels there's too much work for the hours I do. Sorry should have said I work part time so I only get paid for that.

I've said I can't work later then my finish time but he arranges calls and meetings even after this time and then sets us things to do.

Work calls will go on way past my finish time as it's a landline we have plugged in and he said he doesn't want them off.

He then texts saying can I just do this can I just do that.
He doesn't have a cut off as it's his company and he expects everyone to have that ethos.

Honestly I wouldn't be able to do the work that's involved with my part time hours
( as I have lo and no after school clubs said I can't do full time )

[Isleepinahedgefund]

If you’ve tried reasoning with him and he won’t respect your boundaries then all you can control is what you are going to do about it. Be bloody minded and set your boundaries in stone.

Switch off your computer when not working
Unplug the landline when you aren’t working
Block his number when you’re not working so you don’t get texts
Don’t attend the meetings set outside your working time

I sympathise with your situation - it’s never nice to have a boss like that, but you won’t get anywhere with him all the time you keep doing what he wants you to. I

[ErrolTheDragon]

If a call is going on overtime, you'll have to say 'sorry, it's after my work hours and my child needs me now, bye till tomorrow' and hang up.

I've worked from home for over 25 years. I don't keep regular hours because it suits me and my colleagues are in California but I simply don't go near my work computer at the weekend.
You probably can't unplug your landline - do you have an answerphone you can use to filter calls?

Texts out of hours either ignore or say, sure, I'll add that to my list for tomorrow/Monday.

[strawberrylaces29]

Thanks for your replies I just need to set the boundaries like you have a advised.

Yes I can unplug the phones at weekends so will do that and take some of your advice.

But the cut off just won't work with them
He doesn't like clock on off people and to he honest in the office it was easier but being at home he knows we are here and knows we have no choice to say no.

Even late at night he will message and because I've always answered in the past it's just the norm for him

So will have to have a chat with him

He's calling me today to discuss what the plans are for tomorrow
He doesn't switch off and just expects the same from us

It's only since wfh I've realised how bad it is
X

[SorrelBlackbeak]

If it is going to be incredibly difficult to stick to your hours, it's worth letting all calls go to answer machine so you don't answer them immediately - it will be harder for him to phone for a chat if he has to chat with your machine and switch off email notifications.

You can check and know what's coming in, but you can then decide what you need to deal with.

[Unescorted]

Agree with everyone about boundaries. I am assuming that you had set hours before - I would stick to those if at all possible (it worked for your boss before and therefore it should work for them now). Tell them that you are working your previously agreed hours. If they put meetings in that are outside these hours when you accept the meeting ensure that you are clear that you are taking time in lieu.


I create a routine - I get up, go for a run, come back make coffee and bimble around the kitchen, get washed and dressed as if I was going into work. Then log on when it is my time to start work - this is specified in my calendar so people know when I will be in work and when I am leaving for the day. When I have done my hours I log off. Then I have a leaving work routine of reading a book surfing internet for a bit - exactly as I would as if I was commuting on the train.

[user1353245678533567]

He doesn't like clock on off people

Then why does he only pay you for part time hours and not a full time rate if he expects to be able to use you as a full time person? If you want someone available full time hours plus then you pay them full time rate plus a premium.

He's just exploiting you, and manipulating you into accepting it by talking trash about "commitment". Of course he doesn't like "clock on off people" because he wouldn't be able to exploit them for cheap labour like he does with you!

[Hockneypool]

I don’t think he should be calling you on Sunday to discuss plans for Monday. I expect it can keep until Monday or he can put it in an email for you to read in the morning.

I would create some boundaries and some work routines to allow you to start work well and then finish.

How many hours a day or week do you work!

[strawberrylaces29]

Thanks guys

So when I'm in the office I use after school club for lo so I can work more hours

So at home he expects me to work the same as I don't physically have to leave - even though I said to him it's not possible to work those hours now but I'm happy to do part time and initially set the hours with him and he said that's fine.

But when the work comes in and he doesn't appreciate how long it takes to do and secondly my time restraints.

It's strange because there are a few of us and they all do it, if not more?!

I felt under appreciated when I was there so this has just highlighted to me that I don't like the way he works but now I feel trapped as I can't just look for another job, can't not work as can't afford not to so other than say that's my hours and that's it - I have no choice and I just know what's he's going to be like.

Regarding letting calls go to voicemail I can't as he calls, what's app directly to my mobile. The landline is for customers and staff enquiries and it doesn't go off too often

Thank you for your helpful replies

My mum and friends say tell him to stick it as they think and have always thought he was taken advantage but easier said than done in this current climate x

[strawberrylaces29]

@Hockneypool I don't either but I guess he's always texted on a Sunday eve so to him it's normal but to me since working from home it's getting to me.

Usually 30 hrs at the office but I asked to cut to 20 when I'm at home but last week ending up doing way more - like 37

Yes I suppose it's for me to set the boundaries which I feel I tried to do and it's got ignored so now what x

[Hockneypool]

I wouldn’t rush to cut your hours especially when you are doing more than you’re being paid already. If you opt for less hours I think you are just going to end up with less money and not less work.

How about recording all the hours you are working including Sunday night calls and send him a weekly update

[strawberrylaces29]

I'm going to have a chat with him tomorrow
Thing is I have to cut because I can't physically do it
He won't pay me anymore he doesn't pay anyone any extra

[strawberrylaces29]

He's just messaged on what's app saying we have a group meeting first thing. Haven't opened the what's app. He doesn't have a clue so I wish I spoke to him sooner really

Thanks for the advice everyone I'm not going to reply to Him tonight

[SoloMummy]

You need to be logging your hours. Then every time he let's things overrun it's time off for you in lieu. Quite literally you need to say to your boss, "I worked 7 hours more than my hours last week, I can either be paid or take the hours off this week, which would you prefer?"

Set up a calendar for your work commitments. Share it with him. Block out all of your non working hours. Block out time on Monday morning for planning the priorities inviting the boss so that your weekend isn't impacted.

Turn phones off at the end of the working day, REGARDLESS.

RE WhatsApp, block his number after work. Then unblock on working days.

This situation requires you taking greater control.

[strawberrylaces29]

So much easier said than done, reading it gives me anxiety at the thought. I've just looked down and can see 85 messages from the group. It really doesn't stop.
But then like my mum said it has always been this way to be fair. Nothing has changed for him but as we are all at home not in the office he has no control. I simply can't turn off my phone, we are all told we are to take calls in turn. If I blocked him I may as well end my employment.

[strawberrylaces29]

When I've said I've worked a few more hours he tells me I shouldn't have stated so early ?! But what he doesn't appreciate I have to start that early that day otherwise my work wouldn't have got sorted
Over time is out of the question
God he sounds awful doesn't he
Like I've been in a bad relationship and not realised until now lol

[SoloMummy]

Ultimately only you can improve this situation.
I wfh as a norm and am now also teacher lol (lone parent) & I have to be strict else my family suffers.

[strawberrylaces29]

Yeah I know and I have tried but he's never going to see that the work is too much for one part time person
It's my fault for not setting the boundaries a lot sooner as now feel it's too late
But then that's his choice isn't it
I can only do what I'm capable of doing
Just feel bad as there's people who don't have an option to earn money and it can be done IF he respected that I can only do part time and there aren't enough hours in the day
X