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Would you rather?

(17 Posts)
superhamster Thu 22-Feb-18 20:53:44

be born an attractive female, or a below-average attractive/ugly male?

bellasuewow Thu 22-Feb-18 21:01:20

Very good question. When I was younger I was very pretty and looking back I had a lot of very negative attention and scary harassment. It was just life and I should have been grateful that men fancied me because that made me lucky. Now I am older I love being a. Woman but it is restrictive in terms of career and personal freedom.

RealityHasALiberalBias Thu 22-Feb-18 21:05:55

I wouldn’t be comfortable with the sort of power that being an attractive female affords - you’d have so little control over it and be worried about losing your looks. Is it even real power, if it’s bestowed by the male gaze?

So of the two, the man.

UpstartCrow Thu 22-Feb-18 21:20:17

What power? Working class women who are attractive don't marry up. They are not more likely to be offered any job.

I cant imagine being a man. I've been an attractive women.

LassWiADelicateAir Thu 22-Feb-18 21:41:51

I've never wanted to be a boy or a man. I was very pretty, possibly beautiful when younger, slim and very feminine. I am also clever and hardworking.

I wouldn’t be comfortable with the sort of power that being an attractive female affords - you’d have so little control over it and be worried about losing your looks. Is it even real power, if it’s bestowed by the male gaze?

I'm kind of stunned by the above- it seems a strange, judgemental and negative way of looking at life. Really who needs men to put women down when women are more than happy to do it?

brizzledrizzle Thu 22-Feb-18 21:42:57

I'd be happy being an average/below average female when it comes to looks. Good job really :-)

PhelanThePain Thu 22-Feb-18 21:44:03

Male. Hands down. Regardless of appearance and nothing to do with attracting a partner.

OlennasWimple Thu 22-Feb-18 21:45:11

I don't want to be a bloke, ugly or stunning.

I sometimes think that things would be easier if I was male, but fuck it. Being a woman is awesome

PhelanThePain Thu 22-Feb-18 21:45:14

I’d rather live in a world that was built for me than one that was built on top of me.

ClareB83 Thu 22-Feb-18 21:48:13

I'd miss my boobs. And multiple orgasms.

But if I could be a tall white guy for a week that would be fun. Like having a hire car for a week that doesn't really suit you but the novelty is nice.

brizzledrizzle Thu 22-Feb-18 21:50:05

I’d rather live in a world that was built for me than one that was built on top of me.

You can rise above that though. Would you rather have it handed to you on a plate or work for it?

I got to the top of my career in a male dominated industry despite having come from a poorly qualified, working class background. I loved it, got what I needed out of it and then quit. It's all meant for a rewarding life and I'm proud of what I've achieved. I'd have rather done it as a feminist woman than a man.

PhelanThePain Thu 22-Feb-18 21:56:54

You can rise above that though. Would you rather have it handed to you on a plate or work for it?

I’d rather have it as the men have it by working as hard as they worked to get it, not work harder than they had to and wait longer to get the same. But I’m female, so That won’t happen any time soon, which is why I answered male to the question.

Camomila Thu 22-Feb-18 22:14:15

I'd rather be a woman, mainly because I've loved the whole giving birth/breastfeeding/being a mum thing so much.
Lots of my hobbies, interests etc are traditionally female as well.

Tbh I think it's also that I don't have a great imagination and just can't see myself as a man...what would I like/be interested in etc?

RealityHasALiberalBias Thu 22-Feb-18 22:25:28

I'm kind of stunned by the above- it seems a strange, judgemental and negative way of looking at life. Really who needs men to put women down when women are more than happy to do it?

I was answering in the spirit of the OP’s question, which I took to be about which of the two has more “power” / an easier life. Within the confines of that, I think it would be better to be an ugly man. It’s not what I believe about attractive women in general!

It’s a would-you-rather, not “can you imagine being a man?”, or “how do you, as an attractive woman, behave?”.

TheGoldenBough Fri 23-Feb-18 03:02:22

I can't see that I would be any different if I were male.

My hobbies/interests are gender neutral; I don't really wear make up; I don't often wear dresses...

But I can see that the world would treat me very differently.

And I've just been dumped for being the wrong sort of woman again - seems that all that bollocks about men liking independent women is just that and what they want is a woman who will swoon in their general direction everytime shit happens, rather than just getting on with it and sorting it out.

I bet men don't get dumped for just being an adult and getting on with it...

JellySlice Fri 23-Feb-18 07:57:29

I don't care. I'd be born me and just get on with being me.

I don't know any different now. I am a woman, so I just get on with being me. Were I born male, I wouldn't know any different then, either.

Writersblock2 Fri 23-Feb-18 08:02:56

Now I’m older I can say I’d rather be any appearance woman than a man, however in my teen years I desperately wanted to be male. I didn’t feel like a male but I hated my lot in life as a woman. I hated my lack of power, I hated the misogyny surrounding me both in the wider world and at home, and I hated being attacked (sexually) because I was a woman. If that time was now I would have been encouraged to come out as trans, but frankly I think it’s a natural reaction to want to escape your oppression by any means possible. I suspect the psychology behind transwomen and transmen is very different.

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