Total failure of feminist parenting

[Devora]

Shopping today with dd2, who is 6. Couldn't find a long-sleeved T-shirt. Looking round for a sales assistant.

dd tugs my arm: "Mum, ask a man. They always know how to sort things out".

Me: "Women know how to sort things out too! I'll ask whoever I see first".

dd: "No, it must be a man! Men are much, much better at sorting things than women!"

Me: "That's not true, dd! Women are just as good at sorting things out as men".

dd: "They're just not and you know they're not. Men are much cleverer. Now find a MAN."

To appreciate the full insult, you have to know that dd has two mums... Her older sister is a little suffragette, but this one.... My work is not yet done

[DrSeussRevived]

Ah, Devora. Any chance she was yanking your chain...?

[MissAlabamaWhitman]

She's six?

I'd worry if she's still espousing such shite in a decade or so.

Six year olds have all kinds of crazy ideas, being raised by feminists notwithstanding.

[Devora]

She does love twerking. And make-up. And playing kiss chase with boys. I have visions of her in ten years, finding the ultimate teenage rebellion: becoming a Surrendered Wife.

Though she probably has too strong a personality to surrender to anyone (including me). Kind of Boudicca in petticoats

[lorelei9]

Did you ask her where she got that idea?

[Devora]

No. But I will.

When she was 4 she insisted that only men can be doctors. Our GP is female.

[MargaretRiver]

I had the doctor one too, "men are doctors, ladies are nurses"
I reminded her of six female relatives & friends who are doctors
And two male friends who are nurses
But no, I was completely wrong, she'd seen a book at school so she knew better

[TensionWheelsCoolHeels]

Oh dear. I had a proud 'feminist' parent moment the other day with my 10 yr old - give it a few years & yours will get there. DD was into all the things you've said yours is into, for the shortest time...I always felt my rants ahem, guidance fell on deaf ears with DD but she had her own epic rant at my DM after mum questioned why she was doing rugby at school cos rugby's not for girls according to my DM. DD then proceeded to lecture her on how she can do what she wants & just because she's a girl doesn't mean she can't play rugby. DM got a bit flustered saying she didn't realise she liked rugby & wanted to do it. DD looked at her like and said she didn't like it. The point was completely lost on my DM

[ChristineDePisan]

Tsk! Hand in your Feminist Parenting Badge forthwith!

DD is also adamant that doctors are men and nurses are women. DS corrected her last time she said that - so maybe I'm half way there (even if his examples of Doc McStuffin and Doc's mum weren't the most inspired...)

[WhenSheWasBadSheWasHorrid]

When she was 4 she insisted that only men can be doctors. Our GP is female

Mine said the same and has only seen female GPs. Its so frustrating.

[TigersOfAlexpolis]

Mine was fine until she started school. And then the Pinkification and Princessification started.

[BarbarianMum]

I had the doctor/nurse thing with ds1, aged about 5. One looooong lecture later it transpired that he didn't know that "doctor" and "nurse" were different jobs. He thought they did the same thing, and that female doctors were known as nurses So that was alright poor kid

[lorelei9]

Tigers "Mine was fine until she started school"

one friend's son was home in tears from his first day at school because he had a red pencil case and was told by the boys it was "girly". He wanted to go out that afternoon to get a "boy" one. So sad.

[lorelei9]

I am confused by the doctor thing, we always had a female GP and sadly I was at the doc every 5 mins as a little kid. Mum had a good friend who was a policewoman and I actually remember having an argument with the little boy next door when he said women couldn't do that!! Funny the things you remember, I must have been about 3.

Embarrassingly, mum seems to have done a u-turn as she gets older and recently, in hospital, was surprised to see a male nurse. She mostly had a male nurse the previous time she was in!

[itllallbefine]

Does make you wonder where it comes from though. Tell her that the shop wouldn't employ women if that were the case ?

[FreshHorizons]

I expect that she is winding you up! Great fun with a serious parent even when young.

[Lightbulbon]

Blame the media.

[FreshHorizons]

You don't need to blame anyone- she knows her mother and she is having fun! Take the wind out of her sails with the flippant reply it needs.

[FreshHorizons]

I think that she is very intelligent to have managed it at 6yrs - she will go far!

[Devora]

FreshHorizons, she is indeed a little wind-up merchant. When I was a child my mum used to say to us, "You can do anything you like in life, but please promise me you'll never vote Tory or find God". I would never dare say that to dd2, red rag to a bull...

She may just have a fine sense of the absurd. She made the train passengers around us snort today when she asked, "Mum, are we in South America?" I replied, "No darling, South London".

dd1, on the other hand, my little mini-me, is always coming to find me and say, "Mum, come and watch! They're being sexist on the TV!" Ach, it would be dull if they were the same.

[tangerinesarenottheonlyfruit]

I asked DS (7yo) what he thought toddler DD would want for her birthday.

She loves trains, cats, dolls, tractors, cars, balls, cakes, music, dancing and teddies, pretty much.

But DS said "DSIS likes princess stuff". Where is he getting this from?! It's like he never met his sister! She's never expressed any interest in princessy stuff (I'm sure she may well, but it's just not on her horizon right now).

I think maybe because a couple of the girls he plays with are really into it, he figures DD is too.

The marketing message is strong!

[MrNoseybonk]

"Mum, are we in South America?" I replied, "No darling, South London".

So a total failure in geographical parenting too? :)

[Devora]

It's not looking good, MrNoseybonk

[FreshHorizons]

I was right then- stand by for future embarrassments!