Hello
I've always called myself a feminist, but I haven't always lived that way in practise. In my teens I read Spare Rib, I didn't change my name when I got married at 19 in the 80s, my then marriage was, well, difficult but basically in line with my feminist ideals. Then what happened to me? It all started to seem a bit over the top, a bit too much effort, a bit pointless and I felt the effects of all the anti-feminist pressure, I suppose. While still a feminist at heart, I stopped walking the walk.
My last relationship was a nightmare for this. I was with an unabashed chauvinist for 12 years. We talked about it, I made no headway. I'm ashamed to say that I 'compromised' too far, for too long, while still trying to hang on to as much of my own beliefs as I could. I failed to take his beliefs seriously (stuck my head in the sand). It was a source of real problems in our relationship and probably ultimately the reason for it ending (thank goodness) in that I refused to compromise any further and he went off and found the 'nice' 1950s submissive housewife type he always wanted. I'm rather ashamed that I wasted my time on all that.
I'm now with nice lefty man who is pretty feminist in his outlook if not really into the whole politics/theory of it. I've got to say, omg, it's just so relaxing for these everyday life things not to be an issue, just accepted as the norm. So now my life is more sorted, I feel like I'm waking up again. I've loved reading the threads on here - like coming home.
Where do I start? Where is feminism now? What are the big issues? I was never a radical and I don't want to start seeing patriarchal conspiracies in everything (tin hat land, to me) but it IS important and I want to get my feel for this again. Any good contemporary books? Films?
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions
sneaking back to feminism - where to start?
kentishgirl · 25/02/2014 15:43
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