The 'How to Stay Slim, Maybe Lose a Few Pounds, Whilst doing no more than emptying dishwasher,laundry and running round after children diet'

[objectivity]

This is your menu for week one:

Monday
Breakfast - coffee or chai latte
Lunch - nothing
Dinner - 2 pitta bread with any dip
Snacks - cake of some description

Tuesday
Breakfast - coco rocks x 5,including the squidgy rock ones
Lunch - pitta bread with cheese or tuna
Dinner - a fishfinger plus 1 chip, 2 if you misjudged it with the dc's portions
Snacks - jammiedodger

Wednesday
Breakfast - 1 slice toast
Lunch - running around Sainsbury's feeling hungry - buy too much
Dinner Carrot sticks and dips

Thursday
Breakfast - coffee or chai
Lunch - roast beef and horseradish sandwich
Dinner - chocolate Brownies, zucchini cake

Friday
Repeat any of days

Saturday
Breakfast - you got a lie in, skip it
Lunch - brunch with DC,prolly sandwiches or a bacon buttie
Dinner - pasta spirals from leftovers in pan

Sunday
Breakfast - croissant or mega munchers x5
Lunch - Roast of some description
Dinner - pudding such as apple pie or pavlova

Trust me, this works fab.

[electricbarbarella]

is that what you have eaten, that is not good. How can you eat so little, don't you feel sick and dizzy.

[dinny]

You don't eat fruit or veg then?

[Collision]

terrible diet!

no fruit, hardly any veg.

It will not work on a long term level.

[objectivity]

I eat less than this generally and will keep on losing but if I eat approximately the above my weight stays stable.

I can't eat fruit and veg more than once a week as it makes my colon bleed.

[Ledodgy]

Your weight may stay stable but everything else will go to pot if you continue eating like this.

[electricbarbarella]

do you have the help of a dietician if your colon bleeds, sounds veyr dangerous to me.

[objectivity]

No, but I have had a sigmoidoscopy that was painful yet inconclusive. I give up now with NHS and just manage the problem day by day by mostly eatign proteins.

[objectivity]

twas a bit tongue in cheek though, or is that not apparent. Arse. Sorry.

[sophy]

Ha ha I got the joke striaght away.

Reminds me of one of my favourite diets - only eat the kids leftovers. Nothing else. Then you lose weight. Oh how I love fishfingers and ketchup.

My problem is I eat the kids leftovers AND my own food as well.