Elope party

[pickledolive]

Hi we are eloping next year but we are thinking of having a happily ever after party a little while after the wedding. Do you think that sounds naff? Just an informal event at local function room with a buffet etc. It's more to keep family happy really but happy to go along as long as it's a simple get together . What do you guys think is it something people would want to Attend or not bother as it not the ceremony?

[tictac86]

My sister did this and as it was a big party more people came because it cost them less then going to a wedding and was less formal

[Justmuddlingalong]

The after party is usually the best bit of a wedding. Here's hoping you set a trend. Congratulations 🥂

[pickledolive]

Would you send invites out after we elope or before I was planning for about a month after the ceremony ?

[Justmuddlingalong]

Is it a surprise elopement, do people know it's happening?

[pickledolive]

Yes they know

[Budgieinaberet]

Surely if people know it's not exactly eloping, but good luck anyway

[pickledolive]

I suppose it's just a private ceremony then rather than eloping

[Justmuddlingalong]

Maybe send invitations about 6 weeks before the party. That should be enough notice for guests.

[donkeysandzebras]

We had a small wedding and then a party a few weeks later. We gave people loads of notice of the party and had a great turn out. It was a really relaxed evening - we put some money behind the bar and provided some food, there was a DJ and people just chatted & danced. Only downsides were that we'd spend two weeks on honeymoon where I'd eaten & drunk a lot so my wedding dress was less comfortable and people remember the date of the party rather than the date we got married so the few who remember say "happy anniversary" on the wrong date. Given I can't tell you the date on which any of my friends got married, I can forgive them for getting the date slightly wrong.

[maxelly]

Yes elopement used to mean running away to be married in secret without the consent of your parents. Obviously these days it is used more to mean a ceremony with just the bride and groom+witnesses there, often held abroad or away from home, but it does still carry that connotation of family disapproval so to me it's a bit illogical to invite your family to an 'elopement party'!

I would just call it a party to celebrate your marriage (you can put in brackets 'ceremony held privately/abroad on XX date' or something similar just to be clear the guests are not to expect a ceremony at the party) and invite people as far in advance as you like - definitely at least a month in advance or more if anyone will need to travel/stay over... I've attended several of these where for one reason or another the actual ceremony has been held seperately (couple got married abroad, ceremony was religious, bride and/or groom v. shy, family dispute reasons etc etc) and always been happy to attend and just as pleased for the happy couple as if their ceremony was on the same day.

I do think people may expect some of the trappings of a 'wedding reception' though e.g. wedding cake, speeches, first dance? If you don't want to do all that then no worries, up to you, but maybe inform any particularly loud-mouthed relatives in advance (or get your parents to do it) so they can get any moans out of their system before the party itself!

[pickledolive]

Yeah I think that's what I should have called it rather then elopement party. We honestly just want an informal party if my house was big enough I would do it there but it's not.