Struggling with weaning my 8 month old

[Dell80]

Hi All,

First time posting, but hoping for some helpful tips. I've been trying to wean my DD since just before she was 6 months old. It all started off fairly well, she was accepting most new foods we tried with her and the quantities were increasing, until a bad cold hit and it all came to a holt just before she turned 7 months. It's been really difficult ever since.

I'm lucky most days if she has a couple of bites of anything, whether it be on a spoon or she feeds herself. She was ok with breakfast (normally porridge with some fruit purée mixed in and some toast offered too), but she is now largely refusing that too. Her sleep patterns have changed as she is starting to wake less at night so I'm wondering if she's filling up more on milk when she wakes. She's EBF so I don't know what quantity of milk she is having.

I do a feed as soon as she wakes up then offer breakfast an hour or so later. Any time past this and she's too tired and ready for her first nap. I then feed again when she wakes and then offer lunch after couple of hours which she sometimes takes a couple of mouthfuls unless I'm trying something other than chicken and veg or just veg, in which case she clamps shut. We have a similar routine in the afternoon too and same happens at tea time.

Finger food generally gets played with and thrown, unless it's an Ellas kitchen puff/melty stick which she devours without blinking. Sometimes with bread she shoves too much in and then gags until she's sick.

I've also tried giving her her own spoon to hold but it just gets lobbed too. I've been getting frustrated as it takes so much time getting everything prepared to just throw away, but trying to make it fun and happy for her without showing how much it's getting to me. However her weight gain has also slowed almost to a holt - 2oz in 4 weeks so she's dropped under the 9th centile where she has been hovering for a while so I'm worried she's not getting enough nutrition.

I'm trying to persevere, but I'm finding it really hard going. I don't want to feed the same thing all the time, but she's just not having anything else and I'm not really sure what to try next that's not just putting even more work onto it when I already have a freezer full of prepared food that she won't eat.

Any advice would be useful and also if anyone else has been through something similar, a bit a reassurance would be good. I know babies don't starve themselves and you don't see a teenager still eating only purées, but I'm just concerned about it potentially affecting her health if she doesn't start eating soon, especially as I'm going back to work in 2 months and she doesn't take a bottle either.

[LouMumsnet]

Hi there, @Dell80 - we're bumping this for. Hopefully someone will be along with advice very soon.

[ChaosMoon]

I'm having the same issue with DD 7.5 months. Like you, it was a nasty cold that seems to have thrown everything off track. I was really hoping your one reply would be the answer!

[InDubiousBattle]

How many milk feeds is she having in 24 hours op?

[Dell80]

She's having 4-5 feeds during the day and normally waking up once in the night.

[WellVersedInEtiquette]

My son was the same and was also bf. I wasn't overly worried and just gave him a few options on his high chair tray. I tried to make sure we ate together with him so he saw us all trying everything. It's hard not to worry but try not to get too anxious about it around her. We ebf too so I figured he was getting most of his nutrients through my milk. Speak to your hv though if you need some reassurance x

[Dell80]

Since the original post, her first tooth has come through and she had one day where she ate anything offered on a spoon or put in her tray. Since then it's back to normal refusing the spoon and playing with what's on her tray. After the food has been offered, I give her a break and then give her a feed and she generally always takes it so I'm fairly sure she's hungry.

[Stayawayfromitsmouth]

Is she gaining weight? Seems well and active? Then try not to fret. Some babies take longer than others.
Perhaps try withholding the morning breastfeed until after she's had some food. Or if that's too upsetting try it at lunch. Just keep offering food and gradually reduce breastfeeding.

[robocop101]

Hey OP,

I really wouldn't be too worried right now. Just take it slowly. Milk is still her main source.

My DD2 is 7 months and just doesn't enjoy weaning as much as her sister did.

She only really likes pures at the moment she's recently got 2 new teeth too. I'm not worried. I still offer her a choice but we'll go at her pace,

Keep trying gently and she'll get there eventually. You'll have a hungry toddler before you know it

[mummyofrb]

My DD is 10 months I also EBF, she has had a cold for the last week and has eaten barely anything! A spoonful of food here and there, think it's just normal as we can provide them with everything they need. I started weaning at 6 months and she showed very little interest until about 9, flavours excite her but she doesn't seem to need food to fill her if you know what I mean? Apparently some countries EBF for 12 months without weaning so I figure she's fine as long as still filling nappies and not losing weight etc xx

[Imtootired]

I don’t think you should worry too much if she mostly likes the breakfast or chicken and vegetables because most of her nutrition comes from the milk so you don’t need to give a huge variety. Just keep going with small amounts. Maybe yogurt too?

[Dell80]

Thanks for the replies. I'm trying to be a relaxed as I can around her, but it is frustrating. She seems a bit more into self feeding or at least playing with it so I'm giving her more options that she can give herself. I'm having to get used to the mess!
I think my biggest concerns were because her weight gain has slowed right down but she is active, she's rarely still and she's a happy little soul. Also because we're on borrowed time before I go back to work. My hv has been to see us and has been great, she's organised a one on one weaning session in a couple of weeks time and it's useful to hear about your little one @mummyofrb. I'll just keep persevering

[Dell80]

In case anyone has come across this thread and found themselves in the same position that an update may be useful as I know it would have been for me when I worried so much about it at the time. My LO is now 16 months and can eat for England.

At around 9 months she started to turn a corner, gradually eating more and trying new things. She still wasn't a brilliant eater when she started nursery at 10 months but she definitely got better as time went on and tried food there that she wouldn't at home.

Then around her first birthday, lockdown happened which meant back to us giving her 3 meals a day which was worrying, but we needn't have stressed as while she still has off days, there's very little she now won't eat and she can put away a surprising amount along with a couple of snacks in between.

I hope this finds a mum/dad struggling with weaning as I was just to say it will get better though it doesn't seem like it at the time. I still have to pick up lobbed food from the floor, but that's just her being a little tinker.

[Dell80]

In case anyone has come across this thread and found themselves in the same position that an update may be useful as I know it would have been for me when I worried so much about it at the time. My LO is now 16 months and can eat for England.

At around 9 months she started to turn a corner, gradually eating more and trying new things. She still wasn't a brilliant eater when she started nursery at 10 months but she definitely got better as time went on and tried food there that she wouldn't at home.

Then around her first birthday, lockdown happened which meant back to us giving her 3 meals a day which was worrying, but we needn't have stressed as while she still has off days, there's very little she now won't eat and she can put away a surprising amount along with a couple of snacks in between.

I hope this finds a mum/dad struggling with weaning as I was just to say it will get better though it doesn't seem like it at the time. I still have to pick up lobbed food from the floor, but that's just her being a little tinker.

[thetangleteaser]

Amazing to hear she’s just a good eater now! May I ask if you struggled with going back to work with her not eating a lot? My DS is nearly 7 months and Im due back at work early September. He’s EBF and not keen on a bottle at all, he may slowly take EBM from a bottle over a couple of hours but it’s a struggle. His weaning is going well but some days eats more than others and still relies heavily on the boob, any advice on returning to work, did you’re daughter eat better when you weren’t there? It’s filling me with such anxiety and due to lockdown I’ve not been able to leave him and get him settled, nightmare!

[Dell80]

Hi there! Starting nursery was worse for me than for her, I found it really hard to be separated, but she settled pretty well. I think being around the other kids when they were eating spurred her on and she had never taken a bottle from us but she's take it occasionally there. The staff were really patient with her but I get the feeling that she puts them through their paces at times!
I found that she would feed in the morning, then I'd feed her again when I picked her up from nursery and then at bed time. We still pretty much do the same now though with lockdown she's at nursery for less hours as I'm still working from home so she's just round the corner from our house.
Like everything she does, she just did it when she was ready and I'm sure your LO will be the same. My advice would be to try not stress about it, I would get myself really worked up and as I relaxed more, she seemed to also.
Hope that the return to work goes well and the settling in at nursery is pretty quick!

[Homassy]

Thanks so much for updating this @Dell80. My 7 month old has gone from being a great eater since about 5.5 months to screaming during feeds. He still seems to prefer food to milk but I/m at a loss what to do. Tried finger food, more milk/less milk/ holding spoon etc. Some meals are fine, some aren't. I suspect it's a phase which your experience suggests it might be ! This too will pass

[Dell80]

Hi @Homassy, sounds very similar to us. It was awful at the time so you have my sympathies! I know how soul destroying it is, especially when you make so much effort to make the food for it all to go to waste. I found it really tough over those few months until she started eating again as she too preferred milk feeds. I tried to remember the mantra "food before one is just for fun" but it didn't make it any easier! She's suddenly decided she doesn't want breakfast any more but she's just being awkward I hope things get better for you soon!

[Bumblingalong30s]

Thanks so much for your update as I’m currently struggling with this too, will keep going and hope to get through to the other side!