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Anyone else already dreading going back?

(25 Posts)
GodolphianArabian Fri 28-Dec-18 22:39:23

I know that there is still over a week left of the holidays but I'm already feeling anxious. Have work to do before the start of term but feeling sick of it all. I've already had one observation that was only judged as OK despite my spending hours planning it.

If I didn't feel like I would be letting some lovely students down I was thinking about seeing my gp to get signed off.

I'm so cross that the job I enjoyed for well over a decade has become impossible.

OP’s posts: |
user1483390742 Fri 28-Dec-18 23:28:48

I left at Xmas after having had enough of dealing with all the nonsense and spending every holiday dreading going back. Hoping to get some supply work while i plan my next move!

GodolphianArabian Sat 29-Dec-18 07:54:55

I envy you user, I think I need to do the same. Just not feeling brave enough. Teaching has left me feeling exhausted and lacking confidence.

OP’s posts: |
TheBreastmilksOnMe Sat 29-Dec-18 07:56:43

Not a teacher here, just curious- what is it about your professions that are making you feel this way? Is it the expectations and demands placed upon you, the environment you work in, the students?

Teacherlikemisstrunchball Sat 29-Dec-18 07:57:42

🙋‍♀️🙋‍♀️🙋‍♀️ Dreading it. For a whole variety of reasons. Planning to see this year through and then leave....

EvangelineTheStar Sat 29-Dec-18 08:00:48

This will be my last term as I'm leaving at Easter. I'm dreading it though as it's going to be full on with exams and coursework, and I know SLT are going to turn up the heat as I'm leaving.
thankstry and enjoy the rest of your holiday as much as you can. You are going to need your energy for the rest of the term

CuckooCuckooClock Sat 29-Dec-18 08:01:58

I'm not dreading it yet but I have had a couple of the usual nightmares where I forget to prepare and have a class of 60 who are all ignoring me.

It's the constant scrutiny I hate. Someone is always telling me I'm not doing a good enough job and picking apart everything.

Teacherlikemisstrunchball Sat 29-Dec-18 08:06:00

Not a teacher here, just curious- what is it about your professions that are making you feel this way? Is it the expectations and demands placed upon you, the environment you work in, the students?

Most students are lovely, you get some tricky ones, but generally day to day the kids are fine. What makes it hard are the following things:

Lack of support-so you have a difficult pupil and deal with a situation, and then SLT undermine you, meaning that you lose face/respect meaning discipline becomes harder

Never ending requests for data, often at short notice, in a different format to what you have previously provided, with little guidance as to what you need to provide.

Constant CONSTANT observation and criticism and questioning of what you are doing ALL THE TIME. Onus has moved from learning being the pupils’ responsibility to entirely the teachers’.

Teachers are expected to do more all the time and be responsible for more. That BBC programme ‘school’ talked about this. Budgets for everything have been slashed and pupils have more and more complex needs. Teachers want to help pupils but do not have the time or resources to do so effectively. This is unbelievably stressful when you feel that you cannot do your best.

Safeguarding responsibilities-we take this so seriously and there’s always the worry that you’ll miss something important and put a child at risk.

ABitCrapper Sat 29-Dec-18 08:12:06

TheBreastmilk obviously I can't speak for anyone else, but I'm an ex "proper" teacher, and just about to return to a bit of part time supply.
For me it was realising that in most of my classes the majority of students were in some kind of focus group or intervention plan - and I had to track and prove that I was doing the special interventions successfully on a monthly basis. For a majority of students! I was teaching about 200 students per year ... the data entry and tracking alone was a full time job.
Then there's the being "on' and "performing" for upwards of 5 hours a day in front of an audience that doesn't always want to be there, and if they are disruptive it's your fault. If they don't get the results it's your fault. Never mind the fact that they might be sofa surfing, no family support, in care, family bereavement, in with "the wrong crowd", on drugs, or just hate your subject.
60-70 hour weeks for not much pay per hour is standard. Whereas my husband was earning more per hour, did 37.5 hours a week, got paid for overtime, and didn't need a degree and a postgraduate qualification for his job.
There is more but I'm now busy smile

CuckooCuckooClock Sat 29-Dec-18 08:23:53

godolphian if your health is suffering, see your GP. You are not letting students down - the system is letting them down. You cannot compensate for a broken system.

I felt like you last year. I didn't want to take time off because I knew my year 11s would just get a non subject specialist supply and learn very little of use.
Eventually I did take 3 weeks off. I felt so much better when I returned. I needed a proper break to get it in perspective.

user1483390742 Sat 29-Dec-18 08:43:46

OP- Teaching took everything out of me. My personality, my sense of humour and my confidence, all because mgmt always wanted more, no matter how much i gave. I am currently eyeing up jobs in Sainsburys!

GodolphianArabian Sat 29-Dec-18 21:21:06

TheBreastmilksOnMe the job is now impossible. I work three days a week and I would need to work 7 days a week to actually do everything I'm supposed to. I know I'm not doing everything I should be.

So I am expected to plan lessons incorporating challenge, interventions and differentiation with a range of interesting activities. Then I need to mark the work frequently in addition I have to deep mark for every class so many times a term. This deep marking has to be followed up with activities personal to each student to support their learning.

The planning and marking alone takes me way over hours before I even start on the meetings, data entry, form filling, reports, responding to the tonnes of emails I receive. On top of that due to cut backs and changes to the curriculum I'm teaching subjects I've not taught before so need to 'learn' what it is I have to teach.

I do my best but it's not seen as good enough and feel like I'm constantly on the back foot lurching from one thing to another. Its not because I'm disorganised but because it just isn't possible to do everything.

CuckooCuckooClock it's my year 13 students I'm worried about. I will see how things go once I'm back.

User I keep thinking what else I could do. At the moment a job which is just a job really appeals.

OP’s posts: |
HopeClearwater Sat 29-Dec-18 22:59:39

It's the constant scrutiny I hate. Someone is always telling me I'm not doing a good enough job and picking apart everything

This ^^

And often by people who’ve never done it well themselves.

Cauliflowersqueeze Sat 29-Dec-18 23:03:31

Yes I think it’s the feeling that nothing you ever do is good enough. Even if you bust a gut there’s always something that could have been better.
I try to ignore that feeling now. If I’ve done a good enough job that’s good enough.
I think being continually “good” is outstanding. I’d rather have a “good” teacher than one who is “outstanding” for 2 months and then off with a hernia for 6 months.

TheBreastmilksOnMe Sat 29-Dec-18 23:06:12

teacherlikemstrunchbull godolphian abitcrapper I totally hear you and I agree with what you’re all saying. I do personally feel that the current schooling system has to crumble and be rebuilt by people like yourselves.

I think that you’re teaching in the dying throes and it will get worse before it gets better.

It cannot go on like it has and I think it’s supposed to come crashing down, so a better way of educating can come forth.

Holidayshopping Sat 29-Dec-18 23:09:25

I know exactly how you feel.

I go back on the 3rd-it’s too soon.

MintyCedric Sat 29-Dec-18 23:15:43

I'm dreading it and I'm not even teacher (secondary school administrator) - I have no idea how teachers manage.

For me it's the sheer relentlessness of it, and the ever increasing expectations regardless of ever decreasing time, staff and funding.

I wouldn't be a teacher for £1m pa! You're all bloody superheroes afaic.

MintyCedric Sat 29-Dec-18 23:17:37

Holiday you are so right about 3rd being too soon. Autumn term is so bloody long (I go back after the August bank holiday so do almost and extra week that end), and December so manic.

A 3 week Christmas break would be amazing.

SawnUpLooRoll Sat 29-Dec-18 23:24:11

I'm tired. My moods are swinging and I'm worried this will continue into the new term.

I'm also getting a hearing aid next week and I don't know if that will be easy to get used to in the classroom or not.

superram Sat 29-Dec-18 23:28:25

I’m miserable so going to look for something else. I went part-time in September but just work on my days off.

TimeForDinnerDinnerDinner Sun 30-Dec-18 06:16:54

The demands of a teacher are completely ridiculous nowadays. No wonder many dread going back after the holidays.
I taught for 20 years, but left 4 years ago to pursue a new career. I admire anyone who's still in teaching now. I simply do not know how they do it confused

PumpkinPie2016 Sun 30-Dec-18 10:46:55

I'm not looking forward to it this time. It's not the kids - they are mostly fine - even my tricky year 11 class!

However, it's everything else - constant scrutiny all the time and having to work harder than the kids because no matter what they all have to reach their targets.

I lead a key stage in my subject and this last term the HoD has been awful - I literally feel like nothing is ever good enough. The other two key stage leaders feel the same. HoD will ask us to do something/agree with our plans and then later claim she doesn't want that/didn't ask for that etc. It's driving me mad!!

There are two jobs advertised for Easter starts that I fancy but I am doing my leadership course at the moment so really need to stay put until the end of this year.

Unless things improve though I will be looking elsewhere after that.

clowdyweewee Sun 30-Dec-18 15:42:31

We broke up quite late on the 21st, so I don't forget back until the 7th thank God. I've been teaching for 30 years in PrImary and really don't want to teach anymore but at 52 I'd be hard pressed to find another job that pays so well. Only 8 years until retirement- if I last that long.

Piggywaspushed Sun 30-Dec-18 16:46:16

Good heavens, OP, what subject do you teach? Up until your 5th para on your recent post, I assumed you were primary with all the crazy marking/ deep marking crap! My school is all levels of shite for many reasons but we at least don't do the jargon.

I have a job application to do with a closing deadline of the 7th. I want out of where I am , and want (and deserve!) a promotopn (that is me tryign not to have impostor syndrome...) but can't be arsed to do yet anotehr job application.

Piggywaspushed Sun 30-Dec-18 16:46:55

promotion.... clearly the promotopn I deserve is not for typing skills.

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