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Please help me train puppy not to cry at baby gate!

36 replies

sleepdeprivedrus · 03/08/2021 16:43

We brought our 8 week old puppy home at the weekend and he is in the utility room which connects to the open plan kitchen/living room. We have a baby safety gate between the kitchen and utility room to keep him in the utility room. We keep the door between the kitchen and utility room open, and spend most of the daytime in the kitchen/living room area, so he can see and hear us. However he cries and yelps continuously when he is in the utility room alone, even if someone stands right beside him on the kitchen side of the safety gate. As soon as someone goes into the utility room side, he is calm and is happy to entertain himself with toys or to sit quietly, so I don't think he is crying because he wants attention but because he doesn't want to be alone in the room. If I'm in the utility room washing at the sink and he's playing and then I go through the gate into the kitchen, he immediately starts crying. How do I train him to be okay in the utility room without causing some sort of separation anxiety disaster? Confused

OP posts:
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Just10moreminutesplease · 03/08/2021 16:49

Do you keep him in the utility room for long periods of time or just the odd few minutes?

He’s really young so it’s not surprising that he wants to be near you. I’d limit the amount of time he spends in the utility room at first. Then try to introduce the room slowly with a good treat to keep him busy (kongs are great for this). Maybe start off with a minute at a time, with you stood next to the gate, and slowly increase the time and distance.

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susan198130 · 03/08/2021 16:57

We got a puppy 3 weeks ago and are - or were, I feel he's there with it now - crate training him. At first, he would cry as soon as we put him in the crate, but we started putting him in there at numerous times during the day, door open and closed, and put some treats in there so he would take himself in there through his own choice and so that he associated the crate with good things, not just being left. At night time, we don't do that cos we don't want him thinking crate = treats all the time.

So could you not maybe try putting some treats in the utility room and leave the baby gate open, and repeat the same again with the gate closed? My puppy is quite settled in his crate now and happy to be left in there through the night on his own.

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Elphame · 03/08/2021 16:59

He's still really really young and needs to be with you and interacting closely with you. If you satisfy his early emotional needs he is much more likely to grow into a confident happy young dog.

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susan198130 · 03/08/2021 17:00

Also, just to add, I watched a lot of Zak George's youtube videos on training a puppy and he has some really useful advice, so definitely worth checking him out if you haven't already. When we very first got our puppy and he cried, we would only go to him once he stopped and give him a treat and say "relax" because what I get from the numerous dog training videos I've watched, if you go to them when they cry, they associate crying means they come back.

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icedcoffees · 03/08/2021 18:02

Why are you shutting him in the utility room and for how long?

Puppies want to be near you (and should be near you) - you can't just shut them behind a baby gate all day.

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somethinginthewater · 03/08/2021 19:24

He's literally never been on his own before until now and he's a tiny baby. If you persist you will make it worse, definitely.
Would it be an option to have a playpen or crate closer to you?

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WandaVision2 · 03/08/2021 19:26

Poor dog 😞

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SupermanWithTheGreyHair · 03/08/2021 19:28

So the pup spends most of his day in the utility alone? And you expect him to be quiet because he can see you?

Clueless.

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30degreesandmeltinghere · 03/08/2021 19:28

He is still a tiny baby. He needs you not a gate...
Sad

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GetTaeFuck · 03/08/2021 19:29

You’ll keep an 8 week old puppy in the utility room?

Wow. Just. Fucking. Wow.

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HavelockVetinari · 03/08/2021 19:30

@icedcoffees

Why are you shutting him in the utility room and for how long?

Puppies want to be near you (and should be near you) - you can't just shut them behind a baby gate all day.

This. It goes against all their natural instincts, being alone as a puppy = death (in survival terms in the wild, which is why the poor mite is reacting like that).
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LtDansleg · 03/08/2021 19:33

He’s crying because he’s 8 weeks old and needs to be with his mother. When you buy an 8 week old puppy you need to nurture it like it’s mother would. You can’t shut it in the fucking utility room.

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GetTaeFuck · 03/08/2021 19:44

Take the puppy back to the breeder, you have no idea what you’re doing.

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tabulahrasa · 03/08/2021 19:48

You got a puppy to keep in your utility room? Why?

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Moonlaserbearwolf · 03/08/2021 19:59

You need to have him in the kitchen with you. Shut the other kitchen door so the puppy doesn’t have access to the rest of the house, but let him roam around the kitchen and utility area.

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GuyFawkesDay · 03/08/2021 20:02

We brought ours home today. He cried in the pen but we e started feeding him in the pen and crate so it has good association.

There's a gate going on stairs and I fully expect crying if he's left along downstairs but that won't be until he is settled and happier.

Right now he's basically a waggy shadow. Asleep on the sofa snuggled up with us

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GuyFawkesDay · 03/08/2021 20:03

PS he has the run of the downstairs constantly. Pen is just for when I need to temporarily contain him. I'm not sure I'll last more than 2 days!

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AwkwardPaws27 · 03/08/2021 20:06

Try the Facebook group Dog Training Advice and Support.
Your puppy needs to be with you, all the time. He's a baby.
DDog was always with us, we started with doing the "flitting game" & "do it by myself game" (details in the group I suggested) to gradually built his confidence but I honestly didn't pee alone for a couple of months Grin

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SirSniffsAlot · 04/08/2021 08:31

@Elphame

He's still really really young and needs to be with you and interacting closely with you. If you satisfy his early emotional needs he is much more likely to grow into a confident happy young dog.

Basically this. He is a baby and all his instinct is the cry for help when left alone because he's vulnerable.

Work with him. Keep him close and safe and as he grows, he'll grow in confidence. Then you can start to work on helping him feel settled in the utility room.

In the meantime, make sure most the nice things (treats, toys and meals) happen in there (with you present) so he links the space with good times and feeling happy.

Besides, it is very hard to toilet train effectively and efficiently if the puppy is not right by your side for the vast majority of the day.
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budgun · 04/08/2021 08:37

We keep the door between the kitchen and utility room open, and spend most of the daytime in the kitchen/living room area, so he can see and hear us.

Have you ever considered interacting with him?

Seeing and hearing you isn't enough. Why did you get a dog?

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TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 04/08/2021 08:38

I'm not sure I'm reading your post correctly but want to be fair.

It reads as if the puppy is in the utility room all the time, behind the gate, while you and the family go about your daily life downstairs. So he's not allowed to move freely around downstairs and interact with you? But just has to watch from behind the gate? This is why I don't think I can be reading it right because no-one would do that to an eight week old puppy, surely?

Can you explain a bit more clearly how long he's in the utility room for and why he's put in there?

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capercaillie · 04/08/2021 08:40

Let him wander round the kitchen and be with you! At the moment our puppy is restricted to kitchen but there’s pretty much always someone in there and she’s happy. A few weeks on and she’s also fine with us leaving her for short periods - often evenings when she’s super sleepy.

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Shmithecat2 · 04/08/2021 08:41

@GetTaeFuck

Take the puppy back to the breeder, you have no idea what you’re doing.

This.
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Skyla2005 · 04/08/2021 08:51

Why are you trying to keep him in the utility room ? He needs to be where his family are ! What was the point in getting a puppy to keep him away on his own it's cruel

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LimitIsUp · 04/08/2021 15:40

I think you need to come back and clarify a few points OP because it rather sounds like pup is left to his own devices in the utility room every day - which if so - is unkind and inappropriate

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