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Euthanasia regret(7 Posts)
My dog became very ill suddenly at the weekend and was rushed to the vet who referred us to a specialist surgical unit. After examining my dog, who was 10.5 years old, the surgeon said he had a septic abdomen and needed emergency surgery. He said he had only a 50:50 chance and may not survive the op. His organs were beginning to shut down. He couldn't be sure what he would find until he opened him up.
We had 10 mins to make a decision so felt it was best for him to let him go. I was worried about his quality of life if he survived and his age. He was so full of life and I couldn't bear the thought of him being less that he was. Now I am full of regret and think I should have given him a chance. How do I find some peace of mind?
Oh you poor thing. That's so tough. But he was severely ill and in pain. Suppose he'd been through the trauma of surgery and then had to be put down? Then you'd have felt guilty that you didn't let him peacefully pass away. Or suppose he had the surgery and hobbled about with reduced quality of life, in discomfort and vulnerable to flare ups again. You'd feel guilty for that too. sounds like he lived to a good age and then his body was ready and packed up. You just made this peaceful and painless for him, and managed, so you could say good bye.
Plant a shrub in memory of him and have a ceremony. Get the photos of him out and have some printed and framed.
I still look back and question the decision I made for my beautiful 4 year old cocker when she severely damaged her spine, had several major ops within a couple of hours and I was given an option of trying heroic treatment that may still end in her having to be put to sleep after weeks of suffering, or a chance that the suffering might eventually end in a (fairly) good outcome. I said no, I wasn't putting her through that. I still feel bad about it, I still wonder should I have taken that chance for her. But at heart I know I couldn't have done that to her, and my hesitation is about me, not about what was best for her and her quality of life. I couldn't have explained to her about the pain and fear of yet more surgeries and weeks of painful, stressful recovery that may not end well anyway, she just would have experienced the misery.
I'm so sorry you've lost your lovely boy, it's such a huge, huge responsibility and of course you'll question yourself, but you did the unselfish thing in focusing on his quality of life and his experience. That's the most loving, responsible thing you could possibly have done.
I'm so sorry. You're in shock because it all happened so quickly. I 100% think that you did the right thing. I'm of the opinion that a vet wouldn't say that unless it was really necessary. You're understandably reeling. Time heals, I promise, and you will be able to look back on your lovely memories without hurting.
There are a few people in the same boat on the Saying Goodbye thread.
Thanks everyone and hugs to all those in a similar situation.
My elderly cat went through an operation when she had a cancerous tumour in her stomach. Yes I had another year with her and she was my first pet so I couldn't bear to let her go. Cant say the last year was the happiest and if I had the choice again I would choose to put her to sleep. It was very peaceful when it was done, I held and stroked her while the vet injected her
So sorry. It is very hard. I don't think I know anyone who doesn't feel guilty about something when they have a bereavement. You did what you thought was best.