Agressive Dog - Help.

[plea4625]

Hi,

I have an 8 year old shar pei. I have had him from 8 weeks old and know him 'inside out' if you like. He has always been a pretty chilled out dog with the odd grumpy growl here and there but nothing serious. I could do anything with him. We have always kept him on a lead though as he is a powerful dog and never behaved well with other dogs.

However, I would say that since the birth of our daughter in 2013 he has gradually become pretty bad and we are now at the point where he is having to be kept separate to the family while our 16month old is awake for fear that he will turn on me or even worse her. (we keep him in the hall and kitchen and her in the living areas) This is naturally making him worse as he is becoming more isolated.

My husband is at home all day with him and while my daughter and i are out he makes a concentrated effort to exercise him and spend quality time with him. But he is clearly resentful of me in particular when we come home and he has to be kept away from our daughter.

Anyway, it has come to a point where he will no longer to respond to our requests such as going out into the garden or even coming back in. He becomes really aggressive and has even gone for me and my husband. It began with me but he has even begun to turn on him and we are living in fear.

He isn't a healthy dog really. Shar pei dogs come with all sorts of illnesses which they are prone too and he is at the vets frequently with his ears, skin, eyes and arthritis, Nothing life threatening. We keep on top of his health and always have so we know that this can make him miserable.

It is really starting to cause problems for us as a family, we are arguing and just feeling terribly guilty for having to segregate him but feeling like we have no choice. My husband wants to include him more but I won't have him around my daughter for long periods.

Our daughter loves him and while she is never ever left alone with him she shows an interest and it makes me sad they can't build a relationship. .

When you have a dog prior to starting a family you can obviously never anticipate how they will behave when a baby comes along but you just hope all will be well. Sadly in our case it is not and i am terrified that something terrible may happen. It is needless to say that his life has changed since we started our family and it is set to get worse as I am expecting baby number 2 in the summer.

I have been keeping it from family as they are quick to tell me I need to get rid (particularly the in laws who hate dogs anyway) but when you have raised them from a puppy its not an easy decision to make and I feel like I have let the dog down.

By writing this I am slowly acknowledging that it is a problem and I need to address it before the new baby arrives.

I have been intending to discuss it with my vet but i am scared he will suggest I have him put down if he knows how aggressive he has become.

So I was wondering if anyone has experienced anything similar and how they may have dealt with it.

I feel like rehoming an 8 year old aggressive dog who comes with monthly health problems (Costing a fortune) is going to be a challenge and I can not face the alternative.

Thanks for reading.

Lisa x

[tabulahrasa]

You need the vet to make sure none of his health issues are causing pain which can cause aggressive behaviours and run blood tests including a thyroid panel.

Then if that all comes back clear they need to refer you to a qualified behaviourist.

Your vet will not suggest having him PTS, they will possibly offer it as an option and they will do it if you ask them, but they won't suggest it.

[Buttholelane]

I'm with your family personally.
He's not safe around any of you and from the sounds of it has a pretty miserable life with his health issues causing him pain and him snapping at everyone.

[VetNurse]

I don't know much about behaviour but just wanted to say that shar peis are a breed that I just do not trust. I know you shouldn't judge a dog by its breed but I have had so many bad experiences with them that I can't help it.

They were bred to be fighting dogs and when they want to cause trouble they are very quick!

I would get some behavioural advice and quick. You should not have to live with a dog you are scared is going to hurt you or your child. Owning a dog should be an enjoyable experience.

[WienerDiva]

Hi OP,

I'm really sorry to hear you're in this situation, it's a rotten one to be and I've been there.

I've also worked in a veterinary hospital for a number of years and have seen this a few times.

We had a dog that was always over emotional. She just couldn't ever get a handle on her emotions be it happy, excited, scared and grumpy.

After we had our daughter we still kept up with her exercise needs and her meds for her skin allergies.

That being said when my dad was around 12 months she started to get quite grumpy when asked to go to the loo or in her bed etc. eventually she went for me when I asked for her to go into bed so I could answer the door.

We'd already had behaviourists etc to try to deal with her over emotional behaviours.

Unfortunately in the end we did have her put down, she wasn't living a good quality of life.

And ultimately we really didn't want her to injure anyone and then her life end with us feeling hate and resentment in our hearts. It made sense for her to go happy and knowing she was loved. And she really was and is still very much loved by all of us.

You have to think about the quality of life they'll be having knowing that they could snap.

Sometimes, as much as it hurts having them out to sleep is the kindest thing for them.

I'm only writing this as this is our experience but definitely speak to your vet to rule out any health issues.

Be kind to yourselves

[niqnet1]

Agree with first poster. Get the vet to check your dog out just in case there is a health issue causing this behaviour. Maybe there is pain somewhere and he is generally just really grumpy.
Also, do some research into finding a local behaviourist. We had similar issues to you with one of our dogs but his aggression was because he was really scared of the baby but I didn't know that until the behaviourist came out. In our case, I ask the vet for a referral so I knew we wouldn't be getting someone out who would make things worse.
Life at our house is 100% better since working with the behaviourist. It wasn't easy and was a lot of hard work but we're happier and so is our dog.

Hugs x