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Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Teenagers

AP parenting now teens?

8 replies

skerrywind · 05/03/2017 19:48

Any of us around?

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Isadora2007 · 05/03/2017 21:06

Yes Smile

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RhinestoneCowgirl · 05/03/2017 21:07

I'm interested in this, although not at teen years quite yet (DS will be 11 in the summer)

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Isadora2007 · 05/03/2017 21:37

I said yes... though back when I had ds almost 20 years ago now I just fell into AP style parenting and as the internet and forums took off I found it had a name...
so really I've found it to be respectful parenting as the kids have grown up- meeting their needs as they get older is hard and can be challenging. Keeping communication open and honest and respectful can be challenging. And on days like today when I took my 16 year old dd for the morning after pill I feel thankful she can be honest with me but kind of sad too that my baby isn't my baby any more and she is her own person who makes bad choices...but at least she can be honest.

So... it's tough. Letting go is hard. I had a magnet many years ago that said
"In being the best parents can can be We give our children two things. One is roots. The other, Wings" and it's so true. But so hard too.

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SleepWhatSleep1 · 05/03/2017 21:41

I'd like to know if all the hard work now pays off later (DC of 6, 3 and a baby) Grin

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Isadora2007 · 05/03/2017 22:03

Kind of...
I course there are still issues that your children and teens go through. But I have never lost any of the bond or mutual respect with mine that I've seen so many other parents go through.
You reap what you sow I reckon.
Mine are 19, 16, 7 and 4.

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skerrywind · 06/03/2017 12:43

I have older teens too, ( oldest is 19).

I still have an AP approach, and yes the letting go is hard, but they need to fly.

Parenting my teens has been the easiest stage yet, we have a very calm home.. I do think that the AP approach has made things this way, but others tell me that I'm just lucky that I have good kids.

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WankersHacksandThieves · 06/03/2017 18:12

Just for balance - most definitely non AP parenting here and teens (now coming up for 17 and 16) are a dream. None of us are touchy feely people but DSs have always known they are loved and taken care of but we were quite strict parents.

Best stage of parenting by a mile.

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skerrywind · 06/03/2017 18:34

WankersHacksandThieves you can be a "strict" parent and still AP. I have high expectations of behaviour.

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