We had to have our lovely boy euthanized, and then it got worse

[NotTheFordType]

My son (24) and I are hobbyist breeders and avid rat owners.

We currently have had 10 adults and looking to add another 2 males to our current mischief. Selling our most recent litter right now. (We only sell to people we vet as responsible owners.)

When I arrived home from work (I work away) on Tues my son told me our oldest male had fallen out of the cage while the door was open and landed on the floor with an audible thud. This little guy has always been very active and affectionate, loves time out of the cage and cuddles with us. Not afraid of our (bad tempered) cat and has peacefully shared treats with her (such as Lick E Licks)

We took him to the vet on Weds as he seemed very lethargic and had lost weight (although my son told me that had been happening for the past few weeks and I had buried my head in the sand)

Vet diagnosed pituitary tumour (for which there is no treatment.) Gave us an antibiotic and anti inflammatory on the very minor chance it might be an infection instead.

Spent all day Weds basically nursing and hand feeding him. Found he was refusing hard foods but could accept liquids so I ran round to Sainsburys Local and basically cleared their shelves of baby food and custard.

Physically he got stronger - could stand unaided for longer and walk without falling over for a limited period. But it was clear his cognition was affected - he didn't respond to his name (which he always did before, he was very well trained), didn't recognise us, was terrified of the smell of the cat, didn't recognise his cagemate except as a fellow rat. He was suffering.

This morning we made the heart breaking decision to put him to sleep. I thought we might have had the weekend with him but it was clear he was confused and unhappy.

Unfortunately my son couldn't handle this and punched the wall with all his strength, resulting in a broken hand and the whole day being about him and not our loss.

Sorry that wasn't fair. But I really resent that he made our last hour with Bruce about his injury.

I am putting this on MN because I know my son will never read it.

My son now has a major hand injury and needs taxis to and from the local hospital, all of which I'm expected to pay for because he hasn't got a job but needs the treatment.

I'm going to go offline now because I'm upsetting myself. I hope any of you who have lost pets recently can find something solacing.

[lljkk]

Sorry... I laughed. Kids (people) are selfish but that's how they are just like ratties can't help having short lives (& costing a fortune in vet bills).

Is there a backstory of your (teenage? adult?) son being ready to fly the nest but not quite got himself organised.

[70isaLimitNotaTarget]

Your son's reaction is extreme .
Is it possible he blames himsef because the rattie was ill on 'his' watch?

Anyone who keeps little fur-types knows that they are with us for a limited time and we need to accept that they do die , sometimes not as peacefully as we hope.

We had our much loved male guinea euthanised early this year. Part of me was in bits because I basically engineered his death (though he was my daughter's pig and she had the final say) but the main part of my logical brain knows we didn't have any option and anything else would've been cruel. It is the hardest decision to make , especially when you nurse them and look after them (we were syringe feeding and our boar looked to be improving) night and day.

Your DS will have (hopefully) learned albeit the painful way , to park his temper . I think I'd be annoyed if one of mine did that too.

[NotTheFordType]

DS had a very troubled childhood and adolescence with his birth parents and was frequently told that literally everything that went wrong was his fault and that "you always ruin everything".

As you can imagine this has given him significant MH issues and coupled with some SEN it means he's unlikely to be able to live independently for at least the next ten years.

He used to lash out in anger at people around him. That has now stopped but he still lashes out when he is blaming himself for something as painful as this.

Physical pain doesn't seem to teach him a lesson, but maybe a fortnight of not being able to play Xbox might do!

[HirplesWithHaggis]

Poor kid, but I totally understand your resentment, fleeting though it seems to be. You have heroic quantities of compassion.

[NotTheFordType]

Thank you Hirples.

We found out today at the Hand Clinic that he has previously broken his hand and not had medical attention. He has a long history of punching things (inanimate objects, not people thankfully) so this could have happened at any time and he just thought "Well of course my hand is hurting because I punched that door/wall/car."

Back on animal tracks... I popped home tonight as we had an enquiry for a pair of our baby boy rats we're selling. Seeing the male adult cage empty of our senior boy was heartbreaking, but I managed to style it out in front of the buyers, but collapsed in tears after.

I'm famous in my family and friend circle for never crying over anything except losing a family member. But as far as I'm concerned, our ratties are family members. They have certainly brought more joy and happiness to my life than a number of bio family members!

Thanks to all who have posted, it's been comforting to not be on my own with this.

[dreichuplands]

We used to have rats and the single worst thing about it was how upsetting it was when they died. They have such fantastic personalities and such short lives.
I hope your ds hand heals smoothly. Given what he has been through his reaction doesn't sound surprisingly.

[MitziK]

Why would he need a taxi - it's his hand he's broken, not his foot?