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Whether you’re a beauty novice or a confirmed fashionista, this topic is for consulting Mumsnetters on all things style-related. Plus, check out our Swears By page for the inside track on the next Mumsnet must-have.

Completely lost my style mojo

(5 Posts)
FluffyMcCloud Wed 25-Oct-17 22:42:52

This is also bit of a mental health issue but I'd rather post here as it is manifesting as a style issue! And maybe that is easier to work on right now!

I've completely lost me. I have gained a lot of weight in a short time, and I suddenly hate all my clothes. I am still smaller than I was at my biggest (and I was happy and confident when I was the bigger size) but I get dressed in the morning and everything I wear makes me want to cry.

I used to feel confident in my style - which was casual and a bit quirky, maybe a bit young for my age, but I always felt like me and I always felt like I rocked it.

Now... I am a fat, frumpy, unhappy nearly 40 year old. I hate my hair, I hate all my clothes, I hate my fat belly and my enormous thighs. I haven't a single item of clothing I feel good in.

I say this is a mental health issue because I know it is linked to depression and self esteem. BUT I don't know how to fix my mental health right now. I feel like buying clothes is an easier way to fix my style rut grin

What do I do? Buy a whole new wardrobe? Keep wearing the clothes I used to love until I love them again?

I plan to try and lose weight which I hope will help, but what do you do when you completely lose who you are style wise? I hate every time I look in the mirror sad

MayFayner Wed 25-Oct-17 23:43:41

Sorry to hear you're feeling shit. I know this feeling of being a stranger in your own clothes so well.

What used you feel good in? Would you say you're more of an apple shape, or a pear?

FluffyMcCloud Thu 26-Oct-17 07:27:49

I'm definitely an apple. I have good legs (even those are letting me down right now but I'm determined to believe in my good legs!) and a big tummy.
I used to love wearing skater dresses but now I put them on and my butt looks enormous. My wardrobe mainly consists of short dresses or skirts, leggings and boots or leggings with tunic type tops.

I own one pair of jeans which just about still fit but I look like a weeble in them now! And I've no idea what to wear with them - my usual t shirts and jumpers make me look like a grumpy old woman or a weirdo trying to look 16...

I fear I have always looked awful and the scales have simply fallen from my eyes!

My hair is a growing out crop so I hate the length but I want to grow it. I went to hairdressers yesterday to try and make myself feel better but it still looks awful! I own a lot of hair accessories, I love a funky clip or a headband.

I know weight loss will help but in the meantime I need at least one good outfit to feel ok in...

Lelleybells Thu 26-Oct-17 07:54:04

A friend of mine was in a very similar place to you. She basically reinvented herself! She now wears clothes with a 50s vibe with amazing headscarves and gorgeous colours. She put on a bit of weight due to health reasons and having a baby. She completely owns her Look now and it really suits her. Bright jewel colours, gorgeous red hair (coloured), bright lipstick, amazing dresses with tights/leggings and jumpsuits (worn quite loose but with a belt) I am in awe of her style. Maybe trawl Pinterest for some style inspiration? My gorgeous friend spends time at charity shops and browsing on Ebay. I think her new look gives her much needed confidence. Go on be brave and surprise yourself.

MayFayner Thu 26-Oct-17 09:53:04

I was where you are last year and I have to admit I went down the skinny jeans/ jeggings and longish, boxy top route. Not the most fashion-forward but it got me over the hump and I was comfortable!

I got a couple of tops from All-saints, I think they were described as "dresses" in the website but they are mid-thigh on me so tops afaiac.

Also I found black skinny jeans more flattering than blue denim.

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