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Does anyone else think it's rude when people comment "Oh, aren't you cold/overdressed/too hot?" in that?

(16 Posts)
FreyaFriday Wed 08-Jun-16 09:57:52

And it's always 'functional' dressers that make these comments with an incredulous look on their face as if they're superior to you because they don't occupy their minds with 'trivial' things like clothes!

It was hot here yesterday, over 25 degrees, and I wore a playsuit. Got to school pick up and a mum looked me up and down and said "Aren't you cold in that??" as if I'd turned up in a thong and nipple tassels.

I often find I get comments like that because I like clothes and like to look nice. A friend who is another functional dresser made a big hoo-haa a few months ago on a meal out when I wore a fake fur coat "Oooh don't you feel overdressed? Ooh I would in a coat like that".

Pisses me right off! Anyone else?

Buggers Wed 08-Jun-16 09:59:21


FreyaFriday Wed 08-Jun-16 10:07:33

It's just so rude. I'd never have said to the mum yesterday "Don't you feel hot in your bootcut jeans and Regatta hoodie?" or to my friend on the meal out "Don't you feel underdressed in jeans for a night out?" yet if you like to dress nicely you're apparently fair game for snidey comments.

hmcAsWas Wed 08-Jun-16 10:09:35

You're both over sensitive if you find that rude

Sabistick Wed 08-Jun-16 10:11:17

I am a very functional dresser, I wouldn't dream of making comments those, to another adult(who presumably dressed themselves).
Unfortunately there are a lot of impolite twats about! But I'm too polite to draw that to their attention.

AlbusPercival Wed 08-Jun-16 10:12:13

Depends on the context.

If you are a child it is a reasonable question to ask, assuming not, then no, I would assume you are capable of dressing appropriately for the weather etc

TexanKenDoll Wed 08-Jun-16 10:13:48

I'm always cold (unless it's very hot) but always overdressed!

Never knowingly underdressed is pretty much me (I even have my gym gear altered to make sure it fits perfectly, I'm that anal).

Your friends are rude, you should never comment on someone's appearance/weight/clothing, too personal and even what you perceive as a compliment may make them feel uncomfortable. Oh and fur/fake fur is an essential in the UK, it can be cold enough for them even in the 'height' of summer!

lifeissweet Wed 08-Jun-16 10:14:09

I am over sensitive (depression sufferer) and I am fat and self-conscious.

I once went to a party having spent ages psyching myself up for it. I had chosen what I was going to wear - which for me means covering up fairly substantially - only to take a deep breath, walk through the door and be met by friend's mother going:
'Aren't you hot?! You have so many clothes on! Don't you think she must be hot, Sarah? Look - you have tights on. In this weather!'

It went on.

I had to leave because all I could hear in my head was me saying 'yes. I'm hot. I'm also fat and want to hide. Just let me hide and stop going on about it.'

It was rude. She is rude. She has form for it.

LaShopaholic Wed 08-Jun-16 10:15:28

I'd imagine most mean no harm - it does make you seem very sensitive.

hmcAsWas Wed 08-Jun-16 10:16:10

Good grief!

hmcAsWas Wed 08-Jun-16 10:16:35

Not at you LaShopaholic.

Buggers Wed 08-Jun-16 10:19:29

I don't think it's being over sensitive. It works both ways it may be really really hot and you see someone with jeans on and a jacket. They may have a scars they don't want people to see or have an issue with how they look so commenting on it can damage someone's confidence. The same as someone wearing shorts and a vest top may have plucked up the courage for hours to go out dressed like it and the last thing they need is someone commenting on how they look. It's just not needed.

burnishedsilver Wed 08-Jun-16 10:21:05

People are just making conversation. You're way over thinking it.

Buggers Wed 08-Jun-16 10:22:15

lifeissweet sad people don't think sometimes do they!

Buggers Wed 08-Jun-16 10:23:09

Making conversation is - isn't it hot/cold today? Not gawping at someone's outfit and commenting on it because it isn't how they would have dressed this morning.

hmcAsWas Wed 08-Jun-16 10:33:38

"people don't think sometimes do they"

And that's precisely the point. Very often people haven't fully engaged brain, and they don't spend ages ruminating on a hurtful barb to chuck your way in order to put you down..

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