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Connect with other Mumsnetters here for step-parenting advice and support.

Step-parenting

Step Children

12 replies

stangroves · 17/08/2018 18:59

Hi,
I don't know if there is anybody feel the way I do today?
I have just reached the point, Why Bother anymore! I'm just gonna be wrong on every level!
I have tried very hard to be the best Father to my Stepson, but on every turn I have been beaten down.
After Last weekend how he carried on with he's mother and then squaring me up for a fight, more than once, being accused of being a Bully, I still tried to be the Peace maker. But now today I just don't see the point of carrying on.

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SandyY2K · 18/08/2018 01:44

Maybe try not to be a father to him. Just an adult he can see as a role model.

Does he have his dad in his life?

Have you been in his life long?

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stangroves · 18/08/2018 09:24

Hi,
He has never known he’s Father. I came into he’s life when he was 6.

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secre · 18/08/2018 09:25

How old is he now?

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stangroves · 18/08/2018 09:41

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Lollypop701 · 18/08/2018 09:48

If my 24 year old son squared up to his df or me I would ask him to leave. End of. He is an adult, and that would be the consequence.

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secre · 18/08/2018 09:55

Ok.
If you had said 15/16 then my post would be different but at 24 he is an adult. As an adult he should be respectful of his mother and not be squaring up to anyone for a fight. I say this as someone who is not far off that age myself.
Does he live with you? If so I think it might be time that he needs to get his own place. It might make him realise what you and his mother have done for him over the years.

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stangroves · 18/08/2018 10:00

24, won’t pay rent, won’t do any chores, won’t clean up after himself.
Turns it into an argument if you ask him to do anything

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stangroves · 18/08/2018 10:04

I fully agree with you.

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Buggeritimgettingup · 18/08/2018 14:04

None of my children would be getting away with that, on fact even my five year old doesn't! What does his mum say about it all?

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stangroves · 18/08/2018 14:18

I think she has been bullied to such a point that she's too scared to confront him in fear of an argument breaking out.

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Bananasinpyjamas11 · 19/08/2018 02:12

At 24 he should be moving out. His Mum sounds like she’s enabling him so you might have to move out yourself in the end.

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stangroves · 19/08/2018 20:07

Myself moving out will definitely not the option.
I agree with your comment about her enabling him, but I have noticed in the last few days that she has also reached a point where it's either her happiness or him and the misery. But I will most definitely not bend to he's abuse.
If he doesn't like it he can move on. I owe him nothing.