This might be long - sorry!
Myself and my (then) BF had our first child 17 years ago. We were on and off for a bit (had DC1 too young) but I ended up pregnant again with DC2 so we made a go of things.
BF then cheated on me and the young lady ended up pregnant with their DC. We split at this point and he had regular contact with our DC. The relationship with the young lady in question never lasted. 3 years later myself and him decided to make a proper go of things. We are now married and are 10 years down the road.
Now to the problem. Our shared DC2 and his DC can not stand each other. They are now 13 and 12 and have been in each other's lives for 10 years but every other weekend our DC2 is in tears as they can't stand another weekend of his DC being here and his DC is getting more reluctant to come here. There's nothing massive going on just normal sibling squabbles etc but it's weighing DC2 and his DC down hugely.
For our part we have tried (we feel) everything and are on the brink of separating for the sake of one evening a fortnight when the 2 DC are together. His DC gets 1:1 time with Dad away from house every week (picked up after school, out for tea and park etc) and at our house EOW as we felt it was important that his DC didn't have to share Dad all the time.
His DC mum will not change arrangements at all which is fair enough. We asked to change Saturday night to just Sunday all day and DH would go and pick his DC up away from the house and go swimming etc. Then he would do an additional school pick up through the week. It was a flat no.
We thought about bringing his DC to ours later on a Saturday night and leaving first thing Sunday morning. In summer that's fine can go to park or whatever but in winter it just wasn't practical at all.
We try to separate them as much as possible but they both want to be in living room/kitchen rather than in their bedrooms.
We sit down with them and play games etc but it always ends in tears.
Really don't know what to do anymore besides separate from DH so they don't have to see each other which is what they both seem to want.
Is there anything we've not thought of or is it time to say enough is enough after 10 years of trying? I feel like we have been quite selfish and feel terrible about the whole situation.
Forgot to mention DC1 has moved out so that's why they haven't been brought in to the scenarios above.
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Step-parenting
Help needed - half siblings
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ChatNicknameAlreadyInUse · 06/04/2018 15:28
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