I'm recently married and now the step mum of 2 lovely children under 10, one boy and one girl.
The ex wife has been a total nightmare from day 1. She wouldn't let my partner speak to his children on the phone consistently when I first met him, then he stopped trying and she went mad because he just stopped answering her calls and abusive texts. She's only ever asked him once about me, and that was while he was ignoring her because he'd had enough of her behaviour. She's got people to message me online, she's rung my partner over 18 times in a row when wanting to 'speak to the children' on his weeks. It's very sad and she stresses the children out by making sure they remember to come home the next week in the clothes they came to so she has them. She only recently gave him passport details and spare birth certificates after about 18 months. She's very controlling and miserable and bitter. I've ignored it for months because I don't believe in games where children are involved. She's a complete bully and constantly makes other single mums feel sorry for her and i just don't know what to do anymore.
My partner got so stressed at her calling the other month he had to call the police and report her. We both just sat there thinking how did it even come to this?
She has a bit of a shopping addiction and seeing as she's on her own now and there's no financial responsibility between them that's totally fine but she takes it out on him when he sends them to school in 'last years' dresses or trousers even though they fit perfectly, are just plain bits of uniform you get from george asda and are totally fine quality! It's utter madness. She even had the cheek to give the teachers a bag with a hair brush in it and spare clothes and the youngest one now says he's worried about looking like a tramp. (That's what she said in one of her messages to him) It's so upsetting. They are absolutely fine and lovely and gorgeous.
She also writes in the children's school contact books with the most ridiculous comments, trying to make their father (my partner) look irresponsible, and lying about ridiculous things such as not being able to access 'school photos, because their father won't let me see them' - Total lies! The teachers have now started to ignore them because they're so ridiculous.
I'm starting to worry about my partners health and well-being. Very aware of being a step-mum, never ever tried to take place of mum, never will but I'm worried as her behaviour gets more and more horrible and erratic. Especially for the kids. If you saw this lady on the street you wouldn't think twice, but the sad fact is is that something is going on and she just can't stop despising her ex-husband. I'm willing to admit that this behaviour could be something to do with his new relationship but she hasn't made a single effort to try to discuss with him, i've been totally ready to show her i'm not crazy and will love her kids and never try to replace her but I don't think she actually cares. She loves her children instinctively but everything is about what is convenient for her. She never spends time with them in half term and just sends them to 24/7 wrap around care so I don't think (sadly) her behaviour is to do with the kids, I think it's to do with him/me/us. Sorry bit of a rant but think it's needed! Any advice would be greatly appreciated, would just like to get on with life!
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Step-parenting
Mother and ex-wife a nightmare
5 replies
FemaleEunuch · 01/03/2016 16:18
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