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Step-parenting

Meeting his daughter

7 replies

Chattycatty · 11/01/2016 19:28

She's 12 eeek I've forgotten what 12 year old girls are like mines 18 and the rest are boys any advice please

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Wdigin2this · 11/01/2016 20:45

Let her lead the conversation, don't ask too many questions, and basically listen to whatever she wants to say!

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Neverenuff · 11/01/2016 23:01

And be yourself. Don't worry too much she might not have much to say may say to dp your a bit nervous and maybe he can help guide conversations. He could say something like 'why don't you tell Chatty about what you like doing at school/ whatclubs you go to" that sort of thing. Maybe you will have something in common with her. I don't really get on with my dsd all the time she is 12. Very hormonal and unfortunately very conflicted. She likes music, shopping, getting her nails done, loves colouring and crafty stuff and gymnastics and she is really academic. When she comes over I try and ask her about school, what's her favourtite/ least favourtite subject. My dsd likes music and so do I so we talk about what she learns in her music class, what bands she likes. We also play just dance on PlayStation when she is feeling more comfortable with me. ( I have been with dp 4 yrs)

Just try and not be too nervous and take the leads from her. Good luck and have fun xxx

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Bluelilies · 12/01/2016 09:07

My 12 year old DD would talk enthusiastically about pop music or films that she likes, or books that she's into (teen dystopian fiction). She might also hold a conversation OK with someone she doesn't know well about subjects at school. I've always found that talking a bit about my life when I was their age is a good ice breaker with kids to get them talking at ease. Small talk about the food you're eating, etc can help too. Good luck!

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MarkRuffaloCrumble · 12/01/2016 09:17

My DD is 9 and looooves her dad's GF! Probably helps that GF is into Harry Potter like DD and she also likes similar music to ds1 so they have stuff in common too. Once you get chatting about things you both like you'll find some common ground and you'll be fine.

I took a little prezzy when I first met DP's children, prob not necessary, but shows good intentions! Just a little play figure and a bracelet I made with their names on. I get on well with his dd1, although I don't see a huge amount of them. She's 11 and basically if I listen to whatever she's chatting about and make appropriate noises she's happy! She'll come and hug me and in the early days would cuddle up and watch to with me, not so much now as she's got older. She's usually busy with my DCs so it's not quite so intense as it could be without them around.

His DD2 is a bit harder as she's a real daddy's girl, but I'm sure as she grows up things will ease off a bit there too.

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MarkRuffaloCrumble · 12/01/2016 09:17

Watch tv

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DiamondBlue1974 · 13/01/2016 09:18

As a Dad of a DD aged 7 and having recently arranged the meet between my her and new lady friend, I'd say just be yourself, be good humoured and don't make too much effort. You'll be fine :)

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HandsomeGroomGiveHerRoom · 16/01/2016 14:25

Agree with others - just be yourself. I was petrified about meeting dp's teens, but actually it was ace.

Meeting their mother however was another matter entirely. Not because of anything either of us did, I just hated it.

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