As you know i moved my boys out of the primary school they were at last April...and all 3 settled in well for the rest of the school year..... then in september Leigh was placed with a teacher that over the months has proven that she has no interest to learn about his difficulties due to Asperger's etc...and no support in place at all during his most diffult times at Lunch play-so result is that he has been bullied.
So had his IEP meeting on monday and a representative of SENSS (parent partnership) attended with me- and she said that his teacher was defensive and believed that leigh was deliberately making noises/spinning things to annoy HER!!!
So the best we got out of the meeting was a tepid agreement that in sept he would 'maybe' get a separate table in class to work at so as to help him concentrate and in her words 'stop annoyign the other children' - and alao a named lunch lady that he can 'tell tales to'...as the teacher was whimpering on and on about him keeping telling tales....she would not ...and probably could not understand that the reason he tells tales is that he sees everything in 'black and white'...and is like a policeman....so has to report all he sees...all she kept on about is that 'he's just as bad' as the rest! I gave up discussing this with her as i felt sick...and the SENSS woman had pre-arranged with me that she would listen and not contribute as I had told her how bad the last IEP review was conducted and we decidede to let it go the way the SENCo had planned it...and not try yo direct it our way...then the plan was for me to write a leeter summarising the plans for him to have his own desk- and for the named lunch lady (but stressing that really he needs someone who is with him so that there is no need for him to tell tales etc)- and then the SENSS worker said we would wait for the reply- then book another appt to tweak the arrangements...so that come sept it was all in place.
Then right at the end they said they wanted leigh off of school action plus!
I was furious as when the SENSS woman questioned if he's still get the sepatrate table etc...we were told probably not....so i said basically that they were saying on 1 hand...yes....then 5 mins later tring to backtrack and not set it up....this all happened in a 20 min appt.....so i refused to agree to this as i said that there was obviously still a need for the autism outreach team to input.
So.....yesterday after leigh (yet again) begged i let him go back to his old school ...where he feels he has friends.....still in touch with a few of them...so i know they do still like him!!!....I rang the 'old' school (the old Head has left now...and she was the main raeson we left!)...but was told that no room for Alex...so i explained in great detail why i was keen and the head has asked that i go there at 1.30 so that she can show me arround ...to check that i am stilll keen...and to discuss leigh's needs....and there's a chance that she will 'make room' for alex too.
feels odd doing this- as i am relying totally on the fact that leigh feels he will have friends....and because social skills are his main AS problem...i feel that he may be happier. Alex has loads of friends at thiis school too....and at the moment he has a problem with a particular child in his class which has meant that alex cries before school-refuses to get out car etc...and his teacher has not taken him seriously.
My final option is to change them to the school with the Autism unit attached (7 miles away)...which they would be placed in mainsteam classes...but in a school very aware of Aspergers....BUT!!!!! Tom is moving up to secondary this year and i feel that if i'm not careful it will all be too much 'change'. (and that 'autism' school is merging with another in sept- and the Head said that the boys would be at separate sites...and it all just feels too complicated for me to manage.
I feel selfish and awful as i feel that because of how i struggle with changes to routines etc...that i am going for the easyy option which is to get them in at the old school...but at the end of the day...i have do what i can manage...and i have been told by many parents that since the old head left and the new one started that the school is much happier....AND the SENCo is lovely...very into ASD (she once approached me 2 years ago with a pile of books about Asperger's...and offered them to me to borrow!) So i feel that 'at least' if the SENCo is aware of my son's needs...that we are still improving on what we have now....but deep down i wish the autism school was in this town...or that tom was still at primary in sept- then i'd have all 3 at one place
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Here I go Again! (soor! One of MrsF's LONG Rambling Waffling Chaotic Posts!!!)
17 replies
TheRealMrsF · 15/06/2005 09:55
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