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How can I teach my daughter appropriate behaviour with strangers ??

13 replies

mummyloveslucy · 01/07/2009 20:00

Hi, my 4.5 year old daughter has a severe speech disorder and other difficulties that she's being asseced for.
She is a happy, friendly little girl but dosn't seem to know how to act with strangers.
She often says to them "I love you" or "I love you all the world". She sometimes cuddles them too. They always look shocked and I never know what to say. We were out shopping yesterday and every single person she saw she said "hello lady/man, what's you're name called" (I always have to translate what she's saying)
She walked passed a man who's bottum was at her head height and she kissed his bum as she walked passed. Luckily, he didn't notice.
I'm not sure how to explain to her that this is inapropriate with strangers. She just see's it as being kind and friendly.
She used to be very shy, but seems to have become very confidend recently so I don't want to knock that.
It's just a bit wearing and embarassing for me.

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mummyloveslucy · 01/07/2009 20:18

bump.

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mummyloveslucy · 01/07/2009 20:51

Anyone there??

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TotalChaos · 01/07/2009 21:12

would she understand if you make a rule that she's not to hug or kiss anyone without checking with you first? or a rule that she only hugs friends and family?

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mummyloveslucy · 01/07/2009 21:17

I've tried this before and she says "Why not" I'm not sure if she knows what stranger meens either. When she askes a stranger their name, to her they are no longer a stranger. [aaaahh]

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mummyloveslucy · 01/07/2009 21:18

Also to her, a friend is anyone who gives her any attention wether it's a stranger or not.

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brokenspacebar · 01/07/2009 21:22

mll no advice but I am aware my ds doesn't understand the boundaries ... but I can't see what reasonably can be done about it, he is always supervised, so that is my way of dealing with it for now. (he is 5 btw, just about to start ms school in August.)

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5inthebed · 01/07/2009 21:25

I have the same problem with DS2, so no words of wisdom, but will watch this thread with interest.

ATM, he is running up to strange men and saying "daddy, daddy" and giving them a cuddle.

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mummyloveslucy · 01/07/2009 21:28

I'm thinking of bringing back the reigns. Lol
Good to know it's not just her though.

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mummyloveslucy · 01/07/2009 21:32

With mine, every old lady is Mamma.
She came out of a public toilet with me today and announced "Mummy did a poo poo", folowed by a very over exadurated "well done Mummy!".
She got a few chuckes, but my face looked like this

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litleman · 01/07/2009 21:36

Hi I am new here but my son is autistic and I have a real problem with him and strangers/passersbye. He will often say "Thats a lovelly man" about a random stranger. he recentltly climbed onto the lap of a grandfather at the park( with me in hot purseut) and took his chocolate buiscuit from him before kissing him in thanks.... it is a real worry and at least as ds is only 5 I am with him always and can prevent him or at least run after him! I have no real answers for you. I am glad my son is not scared of adults who may well help him if in trouble but terified at the same time that he has no undersanding that stangers are indeed just that and has no concept of appropriate behaviour with adukts or strangers.

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mummyloveslucy · 01/07/2009 21:43

I think I'd find it extreamly sweet and funny if he did that to me.
I do have some understanding about these things though.
My daughter will often take sweets out of little hands and dummies away from babies.
I wonder if she might have mild Autism? it is such a wide spectrum.

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mummyloveslucy · 01/07/2009 21:51

I'm off to bed now, but I'll have a look in the morning.
Thanks everyone xx Good night.

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lou031205 · 03/07/2009 08:30

DD is also over familiar with anyone she meets. It is a worry.

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