Hello, my ds is 9 and doing well in a mainstream school. His teacher is great and let's ds go to the toilet when he asks. Teacher now wants to ask ds to wait until break times so he is not missing parts of lessons.
I would be interested to hear from anyone who has experience of a child who goes to the toilet frequently due to anxiety/ocd/repetitive behaviour. Ds saw a doctor at the hospital who said nothing is medically wrong. Can our GP help if it is anxiety related or a symptom of OCD?
I worry that this has the potential to be very disruptive to his education so I agree that the teacher should try to encourage ds to go at more appropriate times. But should he refuse to let ds go? What is the best way of dealing with this?
I think that is maybe how the teacher will try to do it, by asking my son if he can wait until the next appropriate time. He also said he will prompt ds to go before the lesson starts. I can't think of any other way of dealing with it. In life outside of school we have to plan visits to the toilet where ever we go.
It was so bad at one point ds would go to the toilet then need to go again straight away, he would go about five or six times before he could move on. He gets very anxious. But he is not that bad at the moment.
Is it caused by the fear of wetting, if so would getting him some padded pants make him feel more at ease about waiting.
The teacher may have to start off with getting him to wait 5 minutes from when he asks and build up the time over a number of weeks. The long he holds it, the more comfortable he will feel that he can hold it.
Going to the toilet has always been his escape route when things get to much for him. I guess it has just escalated from there and become a ritual, habit or perhaps it is a genuine need to go. I think I will go back to my GP and see what he says.
We were in the same situation with my DS. It became all consuming and totally dominated every day as each venture out of the house had to be planned around toilets. A psychologist helped enormously - in a nutshell the advice was to pretend that it wasn’t a big issue and shrug it off with a “no problem, there are toilets everywhere”. This helped to cut out all the planning around toilet locations and this then reduced the emphasis on DS needing to go all the time. It still flares up on occasions when he is anxious but it’s not an everyday thing now.
Thank you Broken it is good to hear from someone who has been through this. I had wondered what a psychologist would say. I haven't been making a big deal of it but was thinking I should maybe start trying to stop him from going all the time. But I think from what you say it is best to continue to accept it and let him know it is not a problem. I will ask ds if his teacher is still letting him go so often.
My son (10) was recently diagnosed with autism all though they said it was very slight. One thing he’s always struggled with is holding himself for the toilet. I had an issue recently with his teacher who had told the class they were not allowed to go to the toilet 30 minutes before and after lunch and break and hometime resulting in a very distressed DS when he left school, too scared to go before he left and almost having an accident on the way home. I contacted one of the SEN advisor at the school, they are both very aware and close with him. Told her what happened and needless to say she wasn’t impressed. She called me a few days later to let me know that she had spoken with the teacher and made clear it is not school rules or protocol to enforce this on the children. Everything is good now no more distressed DS 😊