ADHD? Please help!

[clurina32]

Hello mums

Please excuse my ignorance as I do not know much about ADHD or ADD, but I wanted to ask your advice as i'm growing more concerned about my 5 year old son.

A brief history - he was delayed meeting all his milestones - didn't walk until he was 19 months - speech delay, not massively, but didn't really start speaking properly until he was 3. He saw a SALT for a short while, but they signed him off as they thought he was just a bit behind for his age. However his 'understanding' of questions has always been bad and still can be to some degree.

He's recently started year 1 and we are having the same issues we had in reception in that he can't focus properly, doesn't pay attention when he should, talks to his friends constantly, if he's asked to do something he does something completely different! His reception teachers recommended a hearing test over the summer which we did and his hearing is fine (!)

Now I know it could just be a young boy getting used to the school 'environment', especially now he's in year 1 and things are getting a bit more 'school-like'. I know he would much rather play than learn as would any young boy! However i'm concerned that he just can't focus. He's not your typical boisterous boy and isn't disruptive in class, he just sometimes seems to switch off and want to do his own thing rather than take part in the class. A mum said to me the other day at school pick up that everyone liked him because he makes them laugh - which to be honest sent warning bells.

The teachers don't seem too worried about it at the moment as its only week 3 of year 1, they have also said that one-to-one he's doing well and his reading and writing is good. But I am worried it could be a more deep routed problem. Am I being a naturally worried mum or is he just a normal 5 year old getting used to school? There seems to be such a fine line!! I would be so grateful if anyone else whose child has ADHD or anything similar could give me their thoughts?

thanks

[RealEnough]

As well as your instincts the fact that his teachers have flagged up some difficulties is telling. Its difficult for younger children as so many of them are energetic etc. My experience has been that there is no "easy route" for working this out or through. I have a teenager with some of these difficulties (though milder) and am now considering what to do for the best (probably private diagnosis route). I recommend the book ADHD by Paul H Wender. I've read lots of different books on the subject, and this is by far the best - the clearest. And it may help you decide what to do. All the best.

[clurina32]

thank you RealEnough - I think I do need to do some more reading on the subject.

Its difficult because they're your child and you see them everyday so its hard to know what's the norm and what isn't. I'm now wondering whether some of his behaviour at home is significant, but we just haven't realised before because as far as we're concerned that's just who he is!

[RealEnough]

he can't focus properly, doesn't pay attention when he should, talks to his friends constantly

I would definitely look into this.

The fact that he works well one-to-one does not mean anything - lots of children with ADHD work well one-to-one (as there are no distractions!) Teachers will not necessarily pick up on ADHD etc at this age as they have a classroom full of energetic children. You may find you may have to do the spade work in identifying any issues he may have. Don't wait until you are at the end of your tether as you could get extra help at primary school if he does have some of these issues.

I really recommend the book I mentioned. Its an American book but what I liked was that there was a lot of clarity and simplicity in his presentation. And it may help you sort things out in your own mind first before you speak to others.