Not sure if right place to post but would really appreciate the knowledgeable advice of people on this board:
I urgently need help to clarify next steps to support DD1 (15), Y10. To cut long story short and at risk of outing us, she’s been out of school for a week due to social anxiety and some long-term stuff at school. ATM she can’t envisage EVER being able to go back to school – not even into building when other students aren’t around. The last week has been incredibly stressful for all of us and I am finding it hard to think straight and assess her options..
Background: DD1 has had long-term mental health issues around eating disorder, anxiety, depression, OCD. Saw specialist ED CAMHS nurse from Y6 to Y9. Had ADOS assessment for Autism Spectrum Disorder in Y7, below thresholds on 3 triads of impairments but closer to threshold re social & communication issues. Now healthy body weight, normal eating patterns. Signed off by Camhs earlier this year (spring?). Since summer have noticed some signs that she is struggling with social and communication stuff. Possibly some depression going on as well as anxiety, but no sign of OCD or re-appearance of ED afaik.
DD1 is academic high-achiever, creative, excels at English. Attends a large, outstanding secondary school. She is very anxious about falling behind with her GCSEs but adamant that she cannot currently physically go in to school.
We have looked at options of switching to private school or elective home ed. But, through the fog, am thinking that might be best for her to remain on roll for her current school, doing coursework at home, ideally with some kind of home tuition, and perhaps moving to a part-time timetable if and when she feels ready. This way she can stick with her same GCSEs (minimising stress) and stay in contact with her small group of friends, plus teachers know her etc. Also think starting new school might be too really hard ATM. We could also supplement whatever tuition school can offer with some private tuition.
So far we have:
- Got school to agree to sign her off til after Christmas.
- Met with school once (just me & DH, DD considered going but on the day felt she could not). They have come up with some suggestions that might help within school day – but DD1 feels these will all make her stand out more (eg leaving lessons early). They have also suggested part-time timetable. Some work has been sent home for her to do, which has helped alleviate her high anxiety about falling behind.
- Got GP appointment to start re-referral to Camhs (have tried contacting the paediatrician whose care she was under before, but not been able to make contact). Camhs say have to get re-referral as signed off - anyway, don't need ED team.
- Made enquiries about some counselling from a local young people’s mental health charity prior to getting appointment with Camhs.
- Made some enquiries with private schools (we really can’t afford, but would try to find the way if thought this was best option).
- Enquired with only local state school that would consider being able to meet her needs - it is some distance away, not sure how practical.
- Looked at elective home ed options – Oxford Home Schooling, Interhigh etc. Have had call from LA EHE team.
My questions are:
- How much help can we realistically expect from the LA re the home tuition part? How long can she do home tuition for? We’ve been told that max tuition she will get is 5 hours for 12 weeks. Is this right? My understanding is that LA should take full-time education as the starting assumption for someone in DD1’s position. But how do we make the case? Should we be talking directly to LA about this? What happens if she still can’t go back after the 12 weeks or can’t ever do a part-timetable, let alone go back full-time?
- Should we apply for statement or EHCP? Is there still time to do this given she is 15? Would it be worth the battle?
- I want to re-explore the possibility of ASD. Is it realistic to ask for a DISCO assessment if she’s already had an ADOS assessment?
- What are we missing? What else should me & DH be doing?
Trying to turn this potential disaster into opportunity for DD1.
Thank you if you have got this far!