concerned about 9yo dd.

[MikeLitoris]

I've copied this over from childrens health as advised by a couple of poster. Any thoughts would be appreciated.

Not sure if this something or nothing tbh but I have had concerns about dd for a long time and not sure if I should be pushing for some help for her.

I know she is getting to the age now where she is probably getting hormonal but this has all been happening for a few years.

Firstly she is very moody. Not in a stroppy way. She has times of being hyper and bouncy, bordering on hysterical laughter. She can't control it. She laughs at nothing. She will tell me that she has to try really hard not to laugh before coming downstairs in the morning. Its like a compulsion.Other times she can spend days in tears. She never has a reason for it. She says she doesn't know why she is sad. On these days you cannot ask her if she is ok. That just tips her over the edge and she crys for hours. She as more days of ups and downs than 'normal' days.

She struggles to concentrate in school. The teachers describe her as away with the fairies. She can do the work so its not a case of her falling behind.

She doesn't seem very aware of the right way to behave in company. She stands too close to people, even strangers. She thinks nothing of barging through a group of people if she wants to see something. She talks over people, despite being reminded several times not to. She doesn't seem to grasp 'Stranger Danger'. I have to remind her before school daily that she has to use the crossing. If I don't remind her she will just run across the road. I don't think its choosing to ignore me as she knows I'm watching and will be told off.

At the last parents evening I brought this up and her teacher agreed with me. She also mentioned that dd can be quite paranoid. She thinks people are talking about her even when they aren't. If anyone says anything negative to dd she cannot let it go

[MikeLitoris]

I forgot to mention her obsession with money. This is a big worry as she has stolen from me twice that I am aware of. £50 just before Xmas that was spent on cakes for school party and £20 from Ds birthday money. Again that was spent on junk.

She spends hours trawling the house looking for any change she can find. If she does get any money she has to spend it. Saving is just not an option.

[Ineedmorepatience]

Hi mike I have done loads of reading about girls with Asd/ Aspergers recently, mainly because I have one and I am preparing for a tribunal to try to get her a statement at school.

Most girls with these conditions can function quite well socially until they get to key stage 2 or just after because they are master copiers and develop masking strategies to hide their confusion with the world.

I am not saying that your Dd has either of these but maybe if you do a bit of reading around the issue you might be able to either put your mind at rest or get a clearer understanding of what is going on with her.

Keep coming on here for great advice and support.

Good luck

[Ineedmorepatience]

Sorry crossed with polter but singing from the same song sheet

[MikeLitoris]

polter I genuinely have no idea if it's just me being dramatic or if these things are really a cause for concern. I will admit to not knowing anything about ASD etc. I have a lot of reading to do! Any suggestions of where to start with books or websites are much appreciated.

Ineed I think DD is very confused with the world. That is exactly how I would describe her.

I'll try and get appts with the gp and discuss it more. I am on good terms with the school senco as Ds has dyslexia o have had plenty of dealings with her.

[MikeLitoris]

Is it good to keep asking her why she is sad on the teary days? It seems to upset her even more. Or do I just accept that she can't help the way she feels? I feel like I'm digging to much trying to get her to speak to me when she can't articulate her feelings. Am I making her even more confused?

[SwayingBranches]

My ds1 is 9 and has that aged friends and I have friends with daughters coming up to this age and what you describe is not typical in my experience.

My friend who has a child with autism shared a signs of poster on Facebook yesterday which included inappropriate tears or laughter as a sign. My toddler ds2 who has been referred for suspected autism certainly does inappropriate laughter, he can get quite manically giddy.

So no, I wouldn't say you're being dramatic at all. You felt strongly enough to post so you know something isn't right, trust that instinct.

[Ineedmorepatience]

Ooo yes google Asd mind map it comes up in google images and is a really good resource

[Ineedmorepatience]

Oh no ignore that, the one i was thinking about doesnt come up. I will try to find it tomorrow and link it for you.

In the meantime google Girls with Asd or Girls with Aspergers for some good articles.