ABA therapist thinks DSs problems are just behavioural

[smugtandemfeeder]

So now we have a letter from private psych saying DS is highly likely to be on the autistic spectrum.

I invited a random ABA company over, who was amazing with DS. He engaged with him, made him laugh, DS was fab. Therapist was like Mr Tumble for an hour.

However, the ABA tutor said ds DOES NOT have autism and the doctors don't know what they are talking about and we should be very careful following any advice about therapies for autism. He said DSs problems were behavioural and had a sort of judgey Supernanny look on his face.

Does this sound like more of a salesman than a therapist? How would I go about getting recommendations for someone local? are there bad ABA companies about?

[smugtandemfeeder]

Thanks Leonie, its been playing on my mind. At least I'm not the only one with a little actor!

The therapist was great but I think we have enough people judging us at the moment without paying people to do it.

[pigletmania]

I would be very wary about this, the ABA is not in a professional position to make such a dx.

[pigletmania]

meant the ABA tutor

[pigletmania]

That is very unprofessional for the tutor to do this.

[smugtandemfeeder]

Ok so he was a salesman.
An unprofessional one.

How do I find a good one? sman.
An unprofessional one.

How do I find a good one?

[pigletmania]

The thing is I have head that ABA tutors are not regulated in the same way that HCP are, so its difficult. I am not sure, I am sure that someone with more knowledge will be able to tell you

[maryellenwalton]

I could well be missing something, but what would the ABA guy have to gain by saying your DS didn't have autism? Why would it make him a salesman? Surely you'd then be much less likely to take up a full ABA programme.

Apologies if being really dense

[graciousenid]

"Well YEAH - they got on their knees, in her face, and did everything SHE wanted them to do!!! Playing with her, 100% input, 100% attention, all new toys to keep her stimulated and interested, it was like she died and went to heaven!"

this is my ds too - I've had lots of people (including ABA people expressing surprise that he was diagnosed - though all too professional to come out & say 'he doesn't have autism') ... I don't mind tbh, he's got something, calling it autism is as good as calling it anything else.

[smugtandemfeeder]

DS loves ANYONE who gets on their knees and acts like Mr Tumble doing everything he wants, making him laugh. He spent the whole assessment shouting over the top of Mr Tumble, lying on the sofa kicking him. All whilst I sat and had no idea what to do. I really really had no idea what to do.

I tried to do what our shrink said which was to tell DS that I was talking to Mr Tumble for one minute and would then talk to me but as the man pointed out, it wasnt me he wanted to talk to, it was Mr Tumble!!!

Mr Tumble was helpful in some ways. He pointed out that DS had a tongue tie. Why has no one noticed before? No wonder breastfeeding hurt so much in the early day! Well done me for ending up a smugtandemfeeder despite a tongue tie.

He also said DSs tummy problems and huge appetite should be investigated by the doctors.

But for some reason he wanted me to think that the visual aids we use are not actually helping (they are!!) and the ear defender we use do not help and that actually they can do more harm than good.

[smugtandemfeeder]

OK so I have done a search on previous messages and this company is considered to be very good. Graciousenid, electra and silverfrog all have messages saying how much this person has helped them. Dont want to post name of company now in case he reads it!!

Even more confused.

[smugtandemfeeder]

Leonie, I think DS has similar issues. He doesnt need visual aids as such but he likes to know what is happening and if he isnt certain about what is happening he worries. If I tell him it is time to eat he runs about like a headless chicken screaming NOOOOO Ive just got to play with my car NOOOO. If I have some little photos on the wall of him laying the table, sitting down etc he is much more willing to sit down and eat. He tells us off if we forget to use the pictures. (V controlling).

He hates loud unexpected noises and machines which make noises and DD screaming and asks for his ear defenders. At all other times the novelty has worn off and he refuses them.

[smugtandemfeeder]

DSs issues are control based and anxiety based too. He is very confusing. I can say lets go to Tesco and rush out the house with him but if I say we are going somewhere in the car he freaks out and repeatedly asks where we are going, right up until we arrive. I dont know why. It really is about control.

Leonie I think DD also has a tongue tie which explains why I was in total agony when I started feeding both if them. DS fed for 18 hours solid just after he was born and I let him. My nipples almost fell off I think. DD was similar. Agony agony. But I am far too stubborn to let pain and agony stop me. 6.5 years is hardcore though!! I thought I was hardcore until just now!!