Dd (5 next month, ASD with huge sensory issues) got upset last night, well actually we both did. We were looking at the ipad talking book of toy story 2 and played the song where Jessie the Yoddling cowgirl sings about being out grown by the little girl that used to own her. It's sad. I probably fall somewhere on the spectrum and find certain things overwhelmingly sad or scary that other people wouldn't. Don't know if it's nature or nurture but dd is shaping up to be the same. I reasurred her and cuddled her for about 45 mins, we finished the story and had a nice bedtime. she never wants me to say good night so complained a bit when I left her. then she started crying again so I went back up to resettle her. then about 5 mins later she started crying again. so I went up again... (rinse and repeat)
after 4 trips back upstairs I felt I was being played. there were real tears but they were stopping as soon as I appeared and she was VERY chatty she'd been up about an hour later than bedtime at this point so I put my foot down and said I wasn't going back up and if she got up again she would lose her Jessie doll for the night (favorite toy) she started crying again a few mins after I left her but didn't get out of bed. I called up to her to reassure her that I was there but tell her to GO TO SLEEP! eventualy she did. She was very grumpy this morning as she always is when she doesn't get enough sleep. but still a little upset and very clingy.
Should I have comforted her? I know she has issues controlling her emotions and she often says (when upset or tantrumming) that she can't calm down on her own and needs me to help her. my approach to this can be inconsistent (I know, I know...) when we are at home I tell her she needs to learn to calm down and I offer comfort and reassurance only when the screaming her stopped. I tell her she has to learn to calm herself as I can't always be around to help her. when we are away from home it's more difficult so sometime I end up hugging her until she stops (works quickly)
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cruel to be kind or just cruel?
8 replies
Hormonalmoaner · 23/06/2011 08:31
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