I think I will drown

[Glitterzzz]

Sorry for the title but this is my situation. Have a DS who is 10 diagnosed autism and learning difficulties has made a lot of progress but is in special school.

Fast forward now have a 20 month old son who is showing ‘ mild autistic traits’ from what his nursery feedback is. ( attends x2 morning sessions a week) he has maybe 4 words and nothing screaming autism apart from ever increasing sensory issues such as covering his ears and biting banging toys together instead of playing. I have had my suspicions about him since he was 14 months old.. he ‘ failed’ the 18 month check and although there are some positive things I see that my older child couldn’t do such as

Eye contact
Social smiling
Stacking blocks
Waving
Shared joint attention
Bringing me things
Taking turns to play ball games
Some limited speech
An okay level of understanding
Seeks strangers for example in a coffee shop and will get their attention and proceed to smile / hide / smile at them
Plays peek a boo

There are things such as

Tip toe walking
Sensitive to noise
Limited play
Lack of speech
No pointing

The nursery said they are yes / no about him and what they see is ‘ mild ‘ however if you can see ‘ traits’ in this age group is it mild ?

My whole mind is racing because I know what’s involved to raise a child with needs and I don’t know if I’m strong enough to walk this road again:-( also this child is with my second soon to be husband who is adamant nothing is wrong with ‘ his son ‘

Speech therarly won’t start until jan 2018 and the Gp agreed today to refer to the local children’s development centre ...

For me I feel it’s a closed book. A done and dusted outcome and that scares me.

I don’t know what to do

[Ellie56]

I think I too would have concerns in your shoes, so it is good that you have a referral to the children's development centre. If there is a problem it is better that it is identified early, then you can ensure that the right support is put in place.

The fact that your soon to be husband is "adamant there is nothing wrong with his son" is a bit worrying. Because he is not on the same page as you I imagine you are feeling isolated. What has he said about the referral? Do you have anyone else you can talk to in RL?

I don't think there is any such thing as "mild" autism. Those on the higher end of the spectrum just don't exhibit it as obviously.