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16 month old waking at precise times every/all night. Anyone else had experience of this?

(2 Posts)
terryandthechocolateorange Mon 24-Feb-20 10:34:57

So my daughter has never slept well, and certainly has never slept through (has done the odd eight hour stretch but it's once in a blue moon).

She has recently entered into yet another terrible sleep phase and is waking on the dot, same time, every night. 10:20,1:20,4:20 and up for the day at 7. It takes about 10-20mins usually to resettle her, sometimes just a cuddle will do but often she needs boob (if it's me that goes in).

Anyone else have any experience of this? What is it all about?

She struggles to self settle and often needs a bit of a cuddle to go to sleep still, I'm hoping this is something she will learn soon but appreciate it will happen when she's ready. We didn't sleep train her, I just couldn't bare to do it and by the time we felt we really needed to do something about how bad her sleep was, everything was a bit too late in the game. She's a very bright little thing and quite clingy with me still.

I'm trying to wean her from breast feeding as I know it's all linked. I am just exhausted and often use it as a back up superpower if nothing else works. My partner wants me to stop (and doesn't actually know that I still sometimes feed her overnight as it's me that does 99% of the night wakes).

Any advice would be nice. Please be kind - I've been torn apart on here a few times when talking about BF still at her age.

BlingLoving Mon 24-Feb-20 10:43:08

So she's sleeping in 3 hour chunks? Which makes sense - at this age a sleep cycle is about 40-45 minutes long, so she's doing 4 cycles then waking up.

Ds was a terrible sleeper. Didn't start sleeping through the night reliably until he was 6. so I've been through some of this. He also went through phases of waking up after a certain number of cycles.

This is a great book for parents of terrible sleepers: www.amazon.co.uk/Healthy-Sleep-Habits-Happy-Child/dp/0553394800/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=marc+weissbluth&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1582540800&sr=8-1 It is very practical.

One thing we tried when DS was waking after a certain number of sleep cycles was to be there to soothe him back to sleep before he woke properly. Or even to slightly wake him 10 minutes before, then resettle him - in effect, breaking the cycle. doing this for a few days can break the habit of waking at those times or after that number of sleep cycles.

So in your case, first step is I'd be in her room at 10:15, doing whatever your most gentle soothing method is or ready to do it if she so much as murmers (you know your child best). I'd probably just focus on that one to start with and see if it breaks the pattern. If you feel that this will not help as she'll wake up anyway, I'd be in her room at 10:10, waking her up a little then getting her back to sleep.

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