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4 month regression and 2hr wake ups: does it get better?

28 replies

TedLife · 09/10/2019 08:37

As the title suggests, basically wondering if anyone who's LO went through the 4 month sleep regression and was awake every 2 hrs at night ever went back to how they were before? It feels never ending and I genuinely don't know what to do anymore.

OP posts:
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PickMyselfUpAgain · 09/10/2019 08:43

Been there twice. It's painful but I promise you it gets better. I now have two children who sleep for 12 hours each night! Hang in there x

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TedLife · 09/10/2019 08:46

I'm at the point now where I have to feed him back to sleep because I'm so tired I can't physically do anything else. Am I creating a bad habit for him? Sad

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LuckyKitty13 · 09/10/2019 08:51

Absolutely NOT creating bad habits!!! Hes a tiny baby! Do what you need to do! My baby is always fed back to sleep because it's the easiest quickest way, and what they need. Its biologically completely normal.

It will pass.

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SS1987 · 09/10/2019 19:46

I wish I’d worried less about creating these so called bad habits. Do whatever you need to do to get some sleep. It will pass

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Itsarainyday555 · 09/10/2019 19:57

A sleep regression is a phase so don't worry about creating bad habits. Do what you need to do to get through it and when it has passed you can think about creating better habits if you choose to.

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Lazysundays18 · 09/10/2019 20:05

I wouldn't worry about bad habits. You'll break them later. My boy was fed to sleep. He's now 3 and sleeps 13 hour stretches and has been doing this for a good year or so. It's bliss.

(Although we have our second due in a few weeks so we'll be going through it all again 🙈)

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2dogsand1baby · 09/10/2019 20:12

I'm sorry you're going through this, OP. Our 5.5 month old is the same - he wakes and cries every 45 minutes at night at the moment. It's exhausting. Like you, I'm feeding him back to sleep because I don't know what more I can do!?

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Gillian1980 · 09/10/2019 20:48

We’re in the midst of this at the moment too.

I’m feeding back to sleep every waking. The first half the night I put him back in his cot, the second half I’m so shattered I keep him in the bed and feed/doze.

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TedLife · 09/10/2019 21:01

I feel like i'm having a breakdown. I keep desperately googling to try to find some answer as to whether this will end and I can never find an answer. I spent most of this afternoon crying because I had to take him out in the buggy to nap because he wouldn't at home (which he also only did for 30mins in the end) and he was just screaming at me all the way home. When i finally got him home and out of the buggy there was nothing wrong at all.
My husband got home from work at 7.30 and we've been trying to get him to sleep since then (it's 9pm now). Neither of us have eaten dinner. I can't take much more of this and desperately want out of this situation. I don't think i'm cut out to be a mum, I think I hate it.

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girlmummy25 · 09/10/2019 21:38

@TedLife dont be so hard on yourself.
You're smashing this! Well done and go you.
Sleep deprivation is fucking awful and my 4 month old keeps waking up in the night and being awake for an hour and a half :|
Im very precious about my sleep so I find this mega hard.
Do whatever you have to do to get through it and dont even think about rods for own backs because quite frankly you just need to easiest solution.

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SinkGirl · 09/10/2019 21:45

Of course you hate it right now. Sleep deprivation and loud noises (like a baby screaming!) is a very effective method of torture for good reason.

Do what you need to do. Sleep in shifts. Sleep whenever you can. Eat separately. Take shifts to deal with it even if you’re not sleeping - eg DH takes 7-10pm, you take 10pm-1am, etc. Or you go to bed when DH gets home, sleep til midnight and then switch. Are you breastfeeding? If so can DH give a bottle of expressed milk or formula to allow you to get some rest?

We’ve had an awful time with sleep since our twins hit the 4 month regression but they are both autistic so sleep is an issue for them. I still remember feeling like I wanted to die around that time because they never slept at the same time.

Do you have a co sleeper cot? This made a lot of difference to us as you don’t have to get up and down.

Hang in there. This is brutal but it’s not forever.

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Gillian1980 · 09/10/2019 21:53

Stop googling!

It WILL get better, however hard that is to believe.

I vividly remember feeling absolutely desperate at this stage with dd, crying and telling DH that I was going insane and couldn’t carry on (which he found scary!)

But it did get better! This time round I can tell myself that with confidence as I know it’s true. Do whatever you need to in order to survive these weeks, it is the most difficult period.

You can do this! Flowers

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LuckyKitty13 · 13/10/2019 17:50

Get a sling !! Forget the pushchair for now. Visit your local sling library or just google it and call them and they will come to you!

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HayleyHaystack · 18/10/2019 14:58

Hi OP I’m in exactly the same situation. In the night I’m just feeding I cannot rock or swing in physically exhausted. When the feeding doesn’t work I’m almost in tears. The stretches now are as short as 45 min but no longer than 90 min. The daytimes are sometimes so painful. I’ve been trying to get him to nap this afternoon for almost 2 hours. It’s total sh!t.

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DoveGreylove · 21/10/2019 17:16

Hi OP I'm going through the same as you and my baby is only 3.5 months. I hate this too :( I thought I'd be a great mum but I feel like a failure.

You're not alone xx

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heynow12 · 21/10/2019 20:23

Just wondered generally when this phase ended for you all?? I'm also going through this at the moment and my god is it grim. I feel like I could puke with tiredness. I'm also finding the only way to get DD to sleep is by nursing.

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girlmummy25 · 21/10/2019 21:28

@heynow12 im still in this on and off for the last 3 weeks! Some nights shes up for an hour n half. Other nights she sleeps through but will wake at 5:30 or 6am.
Its a killer

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gebs · 22/10/2019 08:31

I feel like I could have written the exact same post, my lo slept brilliantly until about 17weeks, we've had good nights where she'll do one or two wake ups but it's mainly every 1-2hrs. She's now 22 weeks and for the last four days has woken up every 45-60min crying for her dummy when it falls out. I know she can self settle with her dummy but it pops out every time. Went to the hv yesterday who claimed it must be her teeth, tried teething gels in the night and it made no difference. Can someone tell me when this phase ends I feel like I'm doing something wrong!

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justsotiredallthetime · 22/10/2019 08:34

Give her a dose of calpol and keep her topped up whilst she's teething! It does pass - you think it's been forever when in reality it's only been a week.

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SundayGirlB · 22/10/2019 09:05

This is me! I was a crying mess this morning. 5mo wakes every 1-2 hours at night. The torture of just falling alseep to be woken 30mins later and realising its 6 so there isn't a chance of any decent sleep and a day of 30min naps is about to begin!

I feel like I'm going out of my mind.
When does it end people?!

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GeorgieandSeb · 22/10/2019 14:55

Ladies I absolutely could have written this post myself
My boy is now 6 months and still waking every hour/2 hours since 4 months
He's also a crap napper and usually only naps for 30 minutes in his crib or an hour if he's held (which I wouldn't mind doing but I have sooo much stuff to do)
I honestly don't know what to do
I think it was possibly the sleep regression then him learning to sit and roll kinda caused it to stretch out
He's also been soooo dribbly, I keep getting told it's teeth but he's been chewing and bribbling for about 2 months
I feel like I need a caffeine drip

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WMPAGL · 23/10/2019 21:33

Oh god, I love you all - thanks for making me feel less alone!

We're only at 3 months but we're getting the 2 hourly wake ups at night, 45 minute cycles during the day (so an early 4 month regression?) and, I think, teething on top. Sob

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ScrubDubdub · 24/10/2019 15:28

My baby is 9 months and sleeping well, I SWEAR i never thought he would and felt like dying, killing him and / or never doing it again

It does pass

You ARE A GOOD MUM

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Squeakybubbles26 · 28/10/2019 02:06

I feel your pain!

DD1 was a dream and the 4 month regression didn't affect her however DD2 we're having a lot of wake up during the night! She's 15 weeks old and goes to bed fine at the moment at had 6.30! However stirs every hour (dead on) until about 9ish, sleeps well til about 12 then wakes what feels hourly! We use a dummy (which I don't know helps when she spits it out)!
She used to go back to sleep fine with the dummy a few times after 12 for a few hours before a feed but it seems to be getting earlier and earlier now, which means could be feeds at night instead of the 1 😩
Feels like we're going backwards!
How long does it last??

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N12345625 · 28/10/2019 12:59

I could have written this post myself. Although my daughter is only 16 weeks so not sure if it is an early four month sleep regression or she is just an awful sleeper and it is going to get worse.
I think from reading these posts though we have just got to do what we can to get through although I am really worried about creating bad habbits too ☹️

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