Co-"sleeping" issues

[Karmin]

Hi my ds3 is 19 weeks and still waking multiple times a night this was last night:

6:45 Bath and bedtime bottle 7oz
7:15 in cot downstairs
7:45 woke up cried settled with dummy
8:30 as above
9:15 as above
10:30 woke up nappy changed bottle given drunk 3oz
01:52 woke up drunk 4oz
02:43 woke up drunk 1oz
03:42 woke up settled with dummy
03:55 woke again bottle offered drunk 3oz
05:14 woke settled with dummy
05:53 woke settled with dummy
06:24 woke up wide awake and we got up

This is a normal night for us he will take a full bottle at 7ish and then snack for the rest of the night he wakes frequently, throughout the day and night, naps in the day last about 30 minutes unless he is on me.

I would get rid of the dummy but he is incredibly sucky and the relief and calmness that washes over him with it I would feel cruel, he can't particularly use his hands yet so he can't suck his thumb well or put it back in, I don't really know how to explain how intense a boy he is, if I put him down he will scream most of the time as in not just grumpy whining but full on you are murdering me screaming and unless you are entertaining him he generally does this constant whinge.

I can't take him out in the pram for walks or a drive as I'm still suffering from moderate spd my oh takes him for a couple of hours in the morning when he is not out at work to let me get some sleep and sleeps through the night wakings and the days he is off we share the day with him doing plenty to help.

[Karmin]

Just to add he is in with me from about 10ish I struggle to get in and out of bed so moving him to a cot would be difficult for me at the moment as it would take me a while to respond and he works himself up quickly to a frenzy

[Eminado]

Is there any chance he could have silent reflux?

[Karmin]

I honestly don't know, it's not something I have considered as he has never been a sicky baby with posseting or anything. Will make an appointment with the gp

[ispymincepie]

This sounds similar to us. Dcs1,2&3 all bf and would feed more frequently than that even but obviously didn't really disturb me. Dc4 is bottlefed and sleeps much like yours. Soon enough he'll be able to find the dummy himself so that should help. I think it's fairly normal having an unsettled period between 2-5am just try to go to bed earlier so you get a good stretch of sleep in first.

[HumberFisherGermanBight]

What does he lie in when in bed with you? Have you tried a Sleepyhead?

[FATEdestiny]

You can remove 9ne side off any standard cot bed and it will make a stable 3-sided cosleeper cot that you can wedge up to your own bed with matching mattress heights.

This then means you are sort-of cosleeping and you can respond to baby without getting up. But that you and baby get the benefit of having your own mattress space.

You also have not mentioned daytime routine. I would suggest more daytime feeds and more daytime naps. I like EASY, it especially works for bottle fed babies:

• wake and note the time
  

E - Eat. Full feed upon waking
A - Awake time. Limit to 60 minutes max at this age. If grumpy it might only be 30-40m
S - Sleep. Expect about 30-45m. Have you tried a bouncy chair for naps?
Y - You time while baby sleeps.

• wake up and repeat the whole cycle over and over again all day from waking to bedtime.
  

Keep the dummy. Dummies are ace.

[Eminado]

Sorry for not typing a fuller response, am shattered.

Silent reflux the one where they dont posset - the milk doesnt come up and out, just up and it's acidic so still causes heart burn pain.

Your 4th para reminded me of my DD - v sucky, never comfy, painful cry - etc. It improved majorly with meds but it was difficult for me to comprehend what a settled baby sleeps/acts like because she never did .

Now that i have dd2 who doesnt have reflux, i have no idea how i survived that 1st year.

for you - i hope you figure out what it is soon.

[Karmin]

Thank you for all your responses, I have been googling Silent Reflux and a lot does seem to fit him.

In bed he is generally in a gro-bag type thing he hates being swaddled.

In the day he runs his own routine so will get up around 6:30 take milk at about 8ish sleep on the school run have a bit more milk and stay awake until 12, then we have a nap together with him waking every 30 mins ish for a minute or two looking for the dummy or checking i'm there sometimes until 1:30/2 has some milk then he sleeps on the way back from the school run and is awake from 4:30/5ish until bedtime with milk sometime in between. So generally 3 naps and 4/5 feeds