Help me figure out how to make my 5 mo sleep better

[freddiefrogpercypig]

Hello
My 5 mo seems to feed too much I think. He is exclusively bf and feeds every 2-4 hours, usually every 3 hours or so really.
He naps around 4x a day 2x in am for 30 min and a longer one 2 hours after lunch then usually another 30 min around 4:30 but I also have a toddler so it's a bit hit and miss.
At night he goes down quite easily around 6:30 pm. He then wakes around 9:30. Then again around midnight or 1. Then 3. Then 5. And he's usually wide awake at 5:30 for the day. I am sure he doesn't need feeding all these times but I'm so exhausted I can't figure out what to do.
He has a dummy. We put him down on his front now. He's in a gro bag in a cot in his own room but I generally am in there too as his sleeping is so bad.
In the day he goes to sleep either in sling, rocking with white noise. He hates the car and wails in it. Not great in the pushchair either.
In the eve and at night I get him back to sleep by rocking, holding tightly and shushing or shush pat in the cot. I try to put him down drowsy.
Any ideas??? Help I can't function in the day and I also have a toddler who is high octane.

[43percentburnt]

Hi I have 7 month old twins and they are very similar. I was feeding and putting them back in their sleepyheads but have given up and co sleep with both.

Can you sleep from 6.30 onwards with your partner bringing baby to you at 9:30? Then you take over at 1pm? This would at least get you about 6 hours sleep (am assuming you are on maternity leave). When you are less tired you may be able to try other things.

[43percentburnt]

One of mine is a bit sleepier now she is moving - she seems to be more worn out.

[MissElphabaThropp]

What about one of those cots that attach to side of your bed. We didn't have one, but friends that did said they just rolled over, fed sleepily and went back to sleep.

In terms of actual night wakings, he could be going through a leap or growth spurt. Have you checked on wonder weeks?

[FATEdestiny]

I would feed every 90m - 2h throughout the daytime to attempt to calorie load during the daytime.

[marmiteandcheeseplease]

Sorry to say but that sounds pretty normal to me. My ebf daughter is six months and still wakes 2-3 times a night. She has just dropped down to two naps. If you do want to stretch feed intervals at night you could try offering breast more frequently during the day (I've tried this recently and my dd just pushes me away), and/or get your do/dh to help settle your baby at night to see if he can miss a feed at one night waking.

[freddiefrogpercypig]

Thanks everyone. I have an older son but can't remember what he was like! Pretty similar I think though I was sure he slept a bit better than this. The funny thing is I don't mind so much if it's normal. I am worried though that he's waking and not hungry so I'm setting up a sleep association. But I'm too tired to try and change it at the moment.
I think I might try the sleep at 6:30 the n get hub to bring him to be at first waking. Survival at the moment!!
And yes to feeding more on the day. Am also worried a bit that he's still got tongue tie issues so not feeding well enough in the day so still needing feeding at night but I need to go get him weighed again to see what his weight is like.
Urgh. I miss sleep so bad. Am bordering on pnd so desperately wishing these months away when I know I shouldn't

[Diddlydokey]

YY to feeding more in the day if they will take it. My DS wouldn't take it more often, however, it helped him to space the feeds out to 4 hourly in the day as he then learned to take a bigger feed that saw him through for longer. So try the first option first and if, after 5 days it doesn't work, try the other way!

The sleep does sound fairly standard. It often feels worse when they start going to bed early in the evening and the good stretch is before you go to bed.... you don't feel the benefit.

The good news is that it doesn't sound like a feed to sleep issue. It is possibly a habit but too early IMO to try night weaning.

Can your DP try to give a bottle at 9.30 so you can sleep from as early as possible until the second feed?

[Diddlydokey]

YY to feeding more in the day if they will take it. My DS wouldn't take it more often, however, it helped him to space the feeds out to 4 hourly in the day as he then learned to take a bigger feed that saw him through for longer. So try the first option first and if, after 5 days it doesn't work, try the other way!

The sleep does sound fairly standard. It often feels worse when they start going to bed early in the evening and the good stretch is before you go to bed.... you don't feel the benefit.

The good news is that it doesn't sound like a feed to sleep issue. It is possibly a habit but too early IMO to try night weaning.

Can your DP try to give a bottle at 9.30 so you can sleep from as early as possible until the second feed?

There is nothing wrong with not enjoying sleepless nights - they are something to survive and you get the reward of a cute baby and child.

[freddiefrogpercypig]

Ok interestingly last night I slept in with baby and he slept better 6:30/11/2/5/6:30 as I popped his dummy back in before he woke.

So.... Should I ditch the dummy as it seems to me he's waking earlier as he's losing it?

Any tips on getting rid? Daytime as well?

[shipperssss]

It is recommended that you shouldn't remove a dummy before a certain age, due to an increase is SIDS, I think it is 6 months but don't quote me.

[shipperssss]

Lullaby trust suggest gently removing it between 6-12 months of age but not sooner

[FATEdestiny]

Should I ditch the dummy

I wouldn't even consider it. If you have a poor sleeper now, it'll be ten times worse without it.

Dummies are awesome.

[freddiefrogpercypig]

Oh right crap ok. I thought perhaps if I could wean him off it he would stop waking and crying for it. Maybe after 6 months then? May get husband to be on dummy watch this weekend then as I am so broken zzzzz

[FATEdestiny]

By about 7 or 8 months old babies have the dexterity to reinsert their own dummy. That is when The Awesomeness Of Dummies truely comes into its own.

I'd be in no rush to get rid. Restricting to sleep time only would be a great idea because then the suggestion of dummy becomes a sleep trigger. "Shall we go and find your dummy?" become synonymous with "bedtime now", only without the battle.