cry it out step 1

[Mamabear12]

OKay, my first attempt at cry it out has gone okay. I put my 6 month baby boy down for his nap and this time did not use dummy...even though he cried. Thankfully, he cried only 3 mins and was sleeping by 5 mins for his nap. Now, tonight I will continue and not use the dummy even if he wakes at night. To be sure he is not hungry, I will wake him at 10:30pm and give him a milk feed (although he usually only drinks 2 oz anyways at this feed!). I am not looking forward to letting him cry. But hopefully, it will not be for too long, since he is pretty good at falling asleep during the day for his naps. Its just at night I usually dont let him cry bc I worry he might wake my 2 year old up!

[NoIamAngelaHernandez]

Why are you posting?

[Mamabear12]

NoIamAngelaHernandez, this is a message board no? To post messages. DUH.

I have been messaging on here about my lack of getting sleep and wanting to do cry it out for a while...maybe not so often...but now that I have decided to start, thought I would post about it! And continue posting as I do it to get support in case I am having to sit listening to my son cry for 45 mins. Luckily the first time I tried, his crying lasted 3 mins and he is sound asleep now. I do not think it will be so easy in the middle of the night.

[NoIamAngelaHernandez]

Most people use this board to ask for advice or support.
I can't see any request for either advice or support in your post.

If you are looking for support, I would be surprised if you get much here. At 6 months babies need their parents to respond to their needs, and cry it out is an unpopular choice, especially for a baby so young.

Many babies still need night feeds at 6 months.

[EmmaLL25]

I'm sorry but 6 months is very young for cry it out.

Surely controlled crying would be marginally better??

Even health visitors aren't recommending CC until 1 year! I didn't think anyone recommended CIO.

I hope your LO does fall asleep quickly or it will be a miserable time for everyone.

[Mamabear12]

I am not going to starve him of feeds. I will feed him at 10:30pm. When he wakes at might he is not really hungry, as only takes 1 or 2 oz. a dummy puts him back to sleep...so he is not hungry. I don't see a problem with letting a baby cry for a few mins. ESP if it teaches them to sleep better. I feel awful every day from lack of sleep. Every time he wakes, it takes me time to fall back asleep.

I wouldn't leave him to cry more then 45 mins. And of course would check on him during to make sure he is okay.

[sisteroutlaw]

Evening mamabear - people are very passionate about sleep training on mumsnet so that's why you're getting flamed. Just read the warnings on the baby sleep training page on MN.

My DS is just over 6 months and theoretically able to sleep more than 2.5 hours consecutively but it's just not happened. I would love 5 hours sleep on the trot. PM me to let me know how you get on or you could continue to post here but it's a very heated topic.

[NoIamAngelaHernandez]

Well if you are happy to let your young baby cry for 45 minutes then I guess that is what you will do.

Weren't you aware that having a baby would result in sleepless nights? It is one of the things that I think most parents expect.

His crying tells you that he is not ok. That is why he is crying.

[Mamabear12]

sisteroutlaw, I will message you the outcome, or maybe I will continue to post on here...with my first born I was lucky in that she would sleep from 7pm-5am by 5 months. Then one day when she was just over six months old, she woke her usual 5am and I thought why not let her cry a few mins to see if she can settle back to sleep on her own? Well...she fell back asleep after 2 mins of crying. Same thing happened the next day and then we never looked back...she slept 7pm-7am since. She rarely wakes in the night etc.

i believe if you dont give your baby the opportunity to self sooth, they never will bc they dont have to. how do you know they cant put themselves back to sleep if you dont let them try?

im not talking about leaving a child to cry hours on end. but 10-20 mins is okay and MAX 45 mins...if I even let it get to that...I prob wouldnt last past 10 mins.

i understand that a lot of people on this website is against cio...but we are all entitled to our opinions.

And Angela, just because you have a baby, does not mean you need to spend the year with sleepless nights. Some children sleep well and are happier for it. If I can help my baby learn to sleep well...I ail. My daughter is an excellent sleeper and I only had to let her cry 2 mins two nights at 5am when she was just over 6 months. I am hoping something similar will happen when I try it w my son now. I understand all children are differnt and have heard horror stories of people leaving babies to cry for an hour or two!

[Mamabear12]

Okay, 7pm bedtime update. I put my DS down for bed and he cried on and off for 8 mins. I went in a few times and each time he smiled at me. My daughter who is two ran in to check on him and he was all smiles for her as well. After 8 mins of on and off crying, he got that sleepy look, but was moving around to get to sleep. 2 mins later he was sound asleep. No dummy.

I will keep updating every time he wakes tonight. I will feed him around 10:30pm to ensure he is not hungry. Obviously if later in the night he seems very upset and hungry I will feed him again around 3am.

[widdle]

Hi mamabear I think this thread will be really interesting for anyone else who is looking to do this method so don't let others put you off - that's what Mumsnet is for! You can post whatever you want.

FWIW we tried cc when DS was just over 6 months and it didn't work for us. DH took over the bedtime routine and all was well for a week but after that DS was just incredibly upset at bathtime and inconsolable until he came to me. Now he won't settle for DH at all

So then we did a modified gradual retreat where I stayed in the room with him and that worked really well until separation anxiety and illness hit at 10 months.

So now, at 11 months, we are back on the boob to sleep and I'm following the WIO method (wait it out)

DS has slept through from 7:30 to 5:30 the last 2 nights out of 3 - hurrah!!

I think cc works well for some babies but don't be disheartened if it doesn't go well - he is still very very little

Good luck for tonight!

[Mamabear12]

Thanks Widdle :-) Last night was hard on me...but it was no SO bad. I just cant stand hearing my DS cry more then a few mins...makes my tummy hurt. But it went okay. At 3am he cried 20 mins before I caved in...tried boob, but he didnt want that...so gave bottle and he drank an ounce before he was ready to go back to sleep. He woke up again 4am and 5am briefly crying...prob 10 mins or so and I didnt go to him. Each time he fell back asleep and for the first time in a long time slept until 6:30am!

This morning nap he cried 2 mins before he fell asleep and I just put him down and he didn't cry at all! He made some squealing noises (he likes to squeal...his way of talking) and then after one min went quiet...so I went to check on him...he was zonked out! I am happy about it :) so far getting rid of dummy has been easier then I thought. Day time seems to be going very easy...

I just hope tonight goes better. I have a little tummy bug as it is...and listening to him cry makes me feel worse. I think I might just feed him at 10pm and 2:30am...just so i can feed before he wakes and cries...then if he wakes the rest of the night i wont go to him...bc i know he would have had food so won't be hungry. after he does well w this...ill cut back on the 2:30am feed.

Will keep you all updated...I hope he sleeps two hours this nap...will see how it goes!

[Cakeismymaster]

Mama bear a couple of questions - are you a lone parent? If not are you getting help from your partner on this?

[Mamabear12]

I am married, but went abroad for a few months w the kids (husband visits once a month for a week) to visit my parents and spend time w my dad, who is not well. The kids make him happy (they make everyone happy :) ) so I am on my own at night time. My husband is coming at the end of the month and he will take over the late feed (he always does the feed when we are together). My mom takes both kids in morning, baby at 6:30am and my daughter at 7:30am. So I can get another hour or two of sleep. Most mornings my daughter knocks on my room though and asks me to open the door. And I can not resist...so I'm up usually when she gets up.

Ds woke breifly one hour after he fell asleep. Cried for two mins and I went to check on him. He was crying w eyes closed and still obviously tired. He fell back asleep less then a min after I walked out of room...been sleeping solid since.

[Mamabear12]

I put him to bed for the night and no crying. He made a few noises and fell asleep after 5 mins! No dummy still :) Cross fingers this night is better then last night!

[Mamabear12]

Last night went okay, gave him dreamfeed at 10pm and as usual, only drank 2 oz. I tried to give him more...but he jsut doesn't wanter more at that time. He went to bed and did not wake until 4:30am! He cried two mins and back to sleep until 5:30am...he cried a little and back to sleep until 6am. I ended up waking a few times at night bc I guess im used to it and was nervous he would wake!

[Mamabear12]

Happy to report for second night in a row ds has slept through until 7am. All has been well. Thought I would update for anyone thinking about getting rid of dummy or trying crying it out or controlled crying. It does not always have to be difficult. It just took about three days. He only cried once for 20 mins. Rest of the time he cried 2 or 3 mins or not at all. I know not everyone has it easy...but you never know unless you try.

[widdle]

Sounds like a great result mamabear!! Some babies respond really well to cc (not my DS).

Hope you don't get hit with sleep regressions - the reason we decided not to go down the cc route in the end was that so many things seemed to disrupt DS's sleep (illness, separation anxiety, teething) that we would have to constatntly retrain him and I couldn't deal with all of the crying.

Hope you continue to have good sleeps!!

[Mamabear12]

Thanks, I hope it continues as well! He just cut two teeth, so hopefully it will be okay for a few weeks at least :-) I'm hoping we won't have regressions. I never did w my daughter. At least nothing too bad. Of course if they sick you comfort etc. but she would go back to good sleep once better. I'm hoping same for my son!