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Being made to feel inadequate

4 replies

Msgiggles30 · 26/08/2019 10:58

Hi I havent really got anyone to talk to about this in real life and just need to get it off my chest as feeling upset.

Last night I was having sex with my partner (this is not my boyfriend but an on off casual sex partner of 6 years ) and he was a bit drunk - he doesnt normally drink much. He was struggling to hold his erection but seemed to be putting his frustration onto me. Things like getting annoyed when I couldnt get into the position he wanted, even saying things try not to crush me! And also whilst giving him oral he was just telling me exactly what to do and saying certain things feel numb/not doing anything for him. So obviously I am feeling rubbish now.

Hes not been like this before, he is dominant and will tell me how to move etc but never like this totally critical way before. I dont want to get into an emotional conversation with him over one time as we arent in that type of relationship but also this has made me not want to continue. Am I over reacting? Is this his problem not mine? Feeling really rubbish but know ile probably be fine tomorrow

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GrannyHaddock · 26/08/2019 21:57

You're not overreacting at all. What was meant to be sex for your mutual pleasure was spoiled by your partner's critical attitude. Really, who needs that? Surely there are better men out there that will appreciate you properly.

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Msgiggles30 · 26/08/2019 22:04

I know thanks. I have cooled down now and instead of feeling upset I am thinking who is he to make me feel that way! X

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TextbookCase · 27/08/2019 23:36

I think a firm message or two to tell him what bothered you, and one more chance. If he does it again, time to call it a day.

Six years is pretty good value for a casual thing.

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Msgiggles30 · 28/08/2019 00:23

I feel like I'm not 100% ready to call it off over this but at the same time know i should up my self respect and probably just leave it here! I wont bother to message him now but if/when he contacts me I will have to say something. In my heart of hearts I know he wont really care and will feel like hes done nothing wrong. I doubt he even thought about it 2 mins after 🙄