school transfer in year 7. I need some help...

[frangipan]

This is probably going to be long, so I will apologise in advance and try and break it down into manageable 'chunks'.

DS2 11yo is in year 7. DS1 is 14yo and in year 9 at the same school. DS1 is a high flyer. DS2 struggles with school. This is about DS2.

DS2 has not settled in to y7 at all. I received a letter in September stating that DS2 was on the SEN register. I emailed the senco and asked what would be happening with regards to finding out what for and what support would be put in place. He struggled with literacy quite a bit in primary school and I knew he was receiving help at SA stage. I heard nothing from the senco so after a week I emailed her again along with the head of house. I heard nothing. So after another week I emailed the headteacher.

The senco then arranged for some in house assessments. I met wit her and she said he had come out at 2 years ahead of his age in literacy and 1 year ahead in maths. There was an issue with spelling and I was told that would be dealt with in mainstream literacy lessons. By this time DS2 was getting a nice collection of detentions and I was getting phonecalls about behaviour issues. Disruption in class, not finishing tasks, getting distracted, complaining of illness. He was not sleeping well and still awake in the early hours. He wasn't interested in eating and was getting very anxious and moody at home, tearful and angry and saying that he hated the school.

Many meetings were had with the school, I felt there was an underlying issue with DS2 and pressed them about this. They had a behaviour management lady observe two lessons to see what it was that was causing DS2 stress in the classroom environment. Results were that he was fine in class but after talking with him she felt he had very low self esteem and a lack of confidence (I agree with this totally)

I heard nothing further from the school about what strategies could be employed to help. Skip to February this year. Still getting frequent detentions for behaviour and I was still getting phone calls 2-3 x weekly. I found out the senco had left before Christmas and new teacher had filled the post. I got in touch and arranged a meeting. She was great and agreed DS2 had some sort of sensory/environment issues that he was struggling with. For example

-affected by loud noises/very bright lights
-Gets stressed when plans change suddenly
-perfectionist-will throw away a sheet of writing if he makes a spelling mistake
-has issues with certain food textures
-phobic about badges/stickers/things attached to him
-needs tasks to be broken down into lists

He was assessed for dyslexia and has 'tendencies'. By the time this all started coming together though we had decided to remove him from the school, it all came a bit late. We had started a mid term transfer but by this time he had been moved to SA+ and was deemed 'hard to place' under the fair access protocol. So it had to go to panel and we were given a place at our second choice of school on the transfer application. It is a very good school but after a meeting today we are now completely confused!

The head of the new school basically said as they were one of the original academies in 2006 although they 'have' to take DS2 if the LA say they do he is entitled to refuse if he doesn't think it will work. They were quite negative and not very welcoming to DS2 and I picked up on a bit of vibe that they didn't really want him there as they were full and have a waiting list of nearly 200. DS2 was very very quiet and went pale during the meeting and he literally went in on himself.

the HT asked us to 'have a think' if this is what we want and get back to them. Technically he still has a place at current school but they told me on Tuesday that if for any reason DS2 'couldn't make it in they would authorise it' as he clearly doesn't want to be here and if started getting wound up in lessons they would have no alternative but to issue a fixed term exclusion on behaviour grounds. I will have to appeal for a place at the first choice school. But what do I do in the mean time. Do I home educate (no clue how to do this) until it is sorted?

Any thoughts would be appreciated. It has taken two months from the application to move to get to this point.

Have these if you made through x

[prh47bridge]

The head of the new school is wrong. You have been offered a place at this school and, presumably, accepted it. He cannot interview you or your son to decide whether or not your son will be admitted. He cannot withdraw the offer now it has been made.

Having said that, it seems clear that he doesn't want your son in his school and is trying to put pressure on you to make the problem go away. You have to decide whether or not you want to go ahead in the circumstances.

Whatever you decide I would report this conversation to the LA. Whilst they don't have any direct control over the school they may want to take the matter up with the EFA.

[ICantFindAFreeNickName]

TBH I would be concerned about the new heads attitude. Your son is having enough problems without being at a school where the head is not being supportive. I would also report the conversation to the lea, as it's not really acceptable.

I don't want to worry you, but has anyone suggested that your son might have more than dyslexia. My son had a lot of the problems you mentioned, and was finally diagnosed ASD when he was 14. I think it can be missed in primary school if a child keeps up academically, but can become more obvious in Year 7.

I don't know what to suggest regarding the schools. Would Home Ed be a short term possibility to give your son a chance to de-stress and calm down?

[frangipan]

Hi thank you for replying. DH and I have been chatting and are both of the opinion that the new school isn't going to work. Definitely agree that DS2 may have some sensory processing issues.