DH can't cook.

[OrmIrian]

DH is now cooking dinner 4 days a week - sometimes more. He finishes work early, does the school run and then cooks dinner. Which is great. Or it would be if he could cook. Now I know I shouldn't be ungrateful etc etc, but some of it is gopping! He seems to think that chucking some minced beef in a pan, with some garlic and chopped onions and a tin of tomatoes with minimal stirring for 20 mins makes a bolognaise. It doesn't . He is also using loads of bits out of the freezer that I've bought for several meals and bunging them all in one pan, and then ruining them (ie chicken breasts with an aubergine that I'd bought for mousakka. So it's getting expensive too.

At least I'll lose weight .

Children aren't happy either but they won't tell him. They just whisper to me about it.

He won't accept advice. Even just trying to suggest a little salt or pepper might be nice. And if I am caught stirring anything he gets snotty with me.

Any ideas? His cooking skills haven't progressed beyond studenty fare. And he won't accept help. How to help him without prompting divorce. Please.

[pitchforksinmywaistband]

How about suggesting that with the current economic climate, you should meal plan.
Write a list of meals for the week and pin to the fridge.
Make his meals easy ones not to be messed with ie sausage and mash. If he can't cope he might ask for advice then.

[gothicmama]

meal plan together for the coming week, say that it will make shopping easier. Ask him what he likes to cook or sit together with recipe books to pick out what to go on meal plan

[OrmIrian]

Could do. That might help pitchforks. Thanks

[BitOfFun]

I don't think you'd like my cooking much then, Ormy - that sounds just like bolognese to me

[GylesBandwidth]

Could you both cook together at the weekends, and freeze in bulk?
That way you can pass on your culinary expertise to him, without it looking like you're unhappy with what he's currently cooking.

[OrmIrian]

I've got lots of cookery book but I just never use them. I tend to cook by instinct and usually it works. Maybe I'll leave some lying around open ...

Weekend batch cooking sounds good. But I suspect DH won't be around for much of it as we usually spend the weekend rushing around like crazy rarely spending much time together.

[OrmIrian]

at bitoffun.

No nononononon!

You nice tomatoes/passatta and pesto and bacon and red wine...and lots of time. Well I do

[HeadFairy]

Would a gourmet cookery course for christmas be insulting? ie not saying he's a terrible cook but a brilliant one and the course is not to learn but to expand his love of cooking.... blah blah blah (but secretly maybe he'll learn to cook something a bit more palatable)?

BTW, my dh can't boil water, so at least he's trying. But agree chucking a few things in a pan isn't very appetising.

[sagacious]

Get the new JO book. .. the pass it on one ..

Anyone can use it .. even so called incompetant dh's

(the lamb stew is fab and the chicken in lemon and cream takes 20 mins and is lovely)

[HeadFairy]

Or... have you got a slow cooker? Perhaps his day for cooking could be the day you use the slow cooker, then surreptitiously put some extra seasoning and bits in?

[OrmIrian]

Yes headfairy! That is good. Even he can peel spuds and prepare veg. Ha!

[warthog]

hmmm do we have the same dh??? mine thinks boiling minute steak and serving it with grapes is haute cuisine.

[HeadFairy]

Hmmm warthog, tasty!

[Ivvvvyygootscaaared444]

Does he think it tastes ok then?

Slow cooker is a good one - as the food can literaly be thrown in even in basket ball style and the food that comes out is still good.

The JO book is his best cook book yet - I saw it at work (the book club) and it is far better than his others, I have one and never use it to faffy.

JO does a basic stew and then 4 choices of which meats to go in. There is also spag meat balls and how to fry an egg....get him that as an eraly christmas pressy

[OrmIrian]

I think he does ivy.

But this is a man who liked school food.

The bar isn't set that high .

[Mercy]

My dh can't cook either. He can even mess up fishfingers and chips for the dc.

I tend to leave him to do the easier meals, such as roast or sausage and (lumpy) mash.

I could tell you about some of the interesting meals that dh has concocted.

[feelingbitbetter]

I liked school food too and I can cook.
Must agree on the bolognaise - I use braised beef and cook it for about 4 hours till it all melts. Yum!
DP is now a good cook, tho I'm not allowed to stir anything either!

Get him some good easy stew recipes, Sausage and bean, Lamb and pepper, Beef and veg..... you can't go wrong with a stew!
And if he does, make sure you bring home some lovely bread to fill you and DCs up.

[branflake81]

Be patient with him. I am a hopeless cook and a lot of the stuff I produce isn't very nice. I know it deep down but it's hurtful to spend time on something only for it to be left on the plate (or in the case of DP chucked in the bin when my back was turned - yes I am that bad!)

I think the help you give needs to be construtive and "hands off". Don't wade in and interfere when he's actually cooking or after the meal. Maybe wait until a competely sepaarate time in the day, tell him you really appreciate what he's doing but that you'd like to offer some advice. If it were me I would take it on board the next time I cooked but wouldn't make a big deal of it, IYSWIM.

[Anifrangapani]

My dh swears by this website

here

His cooking has imroved significantly.

[BananaSkin]

Oh Gawd - I cook like that seven days a week .

I have an irrational hatred of my DH stirring anything of mine either. The little flavour my food has is from the burnt bits.

I'd use the 'economic climate' suggestion too though.

Which Jamie Oliver book is everyone raving about? We have a couple but each recipe needs endless ingredients.

[Northumberlandlass]

I agree with the dinner list - it works a treat for us. DH works shifts and I have lots of evening stuff to go to. We sit down together and decide on meals for the week, who will cook them etc. JO How to Cook book is great. The homemade meat balls & homemade pasta is one of my DH's favourite things to cook !

[SuckyMuckyCock]

it doesn't make bolognaise?

thats how i do it

[BroccoliSpears]

Even my idiot feckless younger brother can cook with JO's new book.

I think meal planning is your answer here Orm.