My ex and I have recently ended thing's,he had been cheating on me for months,I knew but had no proof but then the OW started posting pictures of them on his Facebook page so I'd see,along with pictures of our 2 boys,we talked things out and I told him we could try work things out but it would take time,we talked and talked,all the usual I love you,need you,sorry was said a lot but it always came back to blaming me because our sex life was very off on my end,I explained to him I needed some romance not just him getting into bed and trying to feel me up when I'm asleep,just for background I'm home alone all week with the 2 kids,4 year old and 1 year old,he worked away lived elsewhere during the week so by the time he got home I was shattered. Anyway he left us last week for the OW, he was seeing her all the time,I asked him when he had the boys to not have them around her,he had told me she has violent towards him,that she had,punched and kicked him and also broke his phone,she has on occasion shouted at me in front of the kids,when he was meant to be taking the boys for overnight but he brought her and I wouldn't allow it,this was before I knew the full extent of what was going on,I was very cagey with the kids after that,as I feel as their mother I need to protect them,I can't chance them arguing and being violent with my kids there,after a few weeks I relented and said he could have them the Friday night,that's all he wanted, he brought them to her house after my express wishes,and telling me he didn't trust her,so since then I'm not allowing over nights,he has nothing for them clothes wise,buggy,car seats, bottles,formula etc, I've offered multiple times he can come collect them and have them for a few hours alone,but his now GF doesn't like that idea,she's messaged me about the kids and him,the usual,I'm a bad mother for breaking their bond blah blah,he didn't care about the bond when his child was roaring crying for him as he was too busy with her, turning his phone off etc,as I look back I know I was stupid but hindsight is amazing. So we are in court in November,he has a few court dates before then for driving offences I think, anyway he messaged me yesterday raging again because I had the gall to ask him for 100 he owes me,he's said he wants no contact until court, because I said he should want to know how his kids are,I don't understand how a man who claims to adore his children can go so long with no contact because his GF doesn't like contact between us,sad,we were together 5 years and up until late 2020 he was great but he just changed,the kids just didn't seem to be a priority,it was always something else was more important,he doesn't pay maintenance,never has,he never really helped much if I'm honest looking back and was always asking me for money though he got double I did a week,I'm on benefits,he works full time because I gave up work to look after our oldest son,it was agreed between us. I'm sad for the kids but I need to make sure they are safe is that so wrong of me? Sorry that was so long,it's been a harrowing few months 😥
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