Hi. Sorry for rambling. Just trying to make sense of it all myself really.
I'm currently feeling so hurt and unhappy in my relationship with DP. We have always had periods of being up and down, but it feels as though for the last month or so, it has been a stream of low level sniping, punctuated by arguments lasting for days.
A big issue is the way he speaks to me. It's not all the time, and certainly not abusive as such, but he can be snappy and sometimes a little snide. An example- I was making dinner in the kitchen Sunday, and I asked him (in a light hearted, sing song type voice), if he'd mind doing a bit of washing up for me. He pretty much bit my head off, told me no and that I should do it myself, and carried on playing his game on his phone. He did then reluctantly come and help, but I was then hurt and the damage was done.
When I leave him with the kids, (2, his), although he's good with them in many ways, I often find his 'discipline' erratic in the respect that he either let's them do more or less whatever they want, or goes overboard with telling them off (time outs for undefined periods of time etc., punishments not really fitting the 'crime' etc.)
Anything we do as a family or couple is (99% of the time) planned and organised by me.
He drinks. Too much. Every now and then, he'll stay up on his own, get wasted and be like a total zombie in the morning. He has now cut down on drinking...but again, this is because I have more or less 'managed' him into it.
Years ago, he was a full time weed smoker, and his moodiness was far worse than it is now. Through my nagging, he went for drugs counselling, and eventually kicked it- but not without lying to me about it on several occasions (that I know of). This has of course, reduced my trust in him.
Despite all this, we do have good periods where he seems to take more of an active interest in me and family life in general. But honestly, I'm not sure if I should cut my losses. I'm mid 40's, and our kids are 11 & 5.
There are more incidents of his behaviour, but I'd be here all day, and I'm sure I'm not perfect..🤷♀️
I don't really know what- if anything- I'm asking. I just wanted to get it out there I guess.
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Snappy, miserable partner.
11 replies
PatButchersEarring · 23/02/2021 11:59
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