My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

He loves me more than the dog got me thinking.....

5 replies

nj32 · 29/07/2020 20:03

I live with my partner of 3 years, both have children from previous relationships. We had a what would you do in this situation conversation in the early days of which I didn't really like the answer but tried not to over think it.
Today we talking about some relatives and I said well I know that he would choose his wife over his ex wife if both required a kidney. My partner said well I would prioritise my kids sorry. So if I or his ex partner required a kidney he would choose his ex due his kids potentially losing a mother etc. Is this a reasonable way at looking at things?

OP posts:
Report
Yeahmetoo · 29/07/2020 21:48

God that's tough. I can see both sides, to you it feels like he is choosing his ex over you, but I guess to him it feels like he is choosing his kids, I guess if you imagine him sitting down and talking with his kids in this hypothetical situation and saying "I've chosen not to save your mum" that would be a pretty tough conversation. So I think I err slightly towards his view.

I get why it would sting though.

Report
Shoxfordian · 29/07/2020 21:49

He might think it but no need to tell you

Report
GetUpAgain · 29/07/2020 21:51

Depends how old the kids are. If they are in their 30s its very different to if they are toddlers!! Assuming they are young, I think he has the right attitude. Sorry.

Report
nj32 · 29/07/2020 23:15

Thanks for the replies, primary school age. Yeahmetoo that was what was mentioned before how could he tell the kids.
It does feel a bit like he is choosing his ex but will try not to let my insecurities get the better of me.

OP posts:
Report
Lovingyou · 29/07/2020 23:19

In all honesty, I think it's a daft and unfair question to ask anyone.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.