Hi mumsnetters
Looking for some advice/confirmation that leaving my DP is the right thing to do.
We have been together for 5 years and have a beautiful 1 year old DD. For a while I have been having doubts and have wanted to leave him but never got over that ‘final hurdle’ of actualy going.
My partner is brilliant with DD and can be the best partner and would do ANYTHING for me to be happy.
However, he can be quite abusive. Since I met him I have known he takes cocaine, it didn’t bother me at first but over the years and especially since DD it has really started to affect me. When he is high or on a comedown he calls me fat and ugly and disgusting, he accuses me of cheating with anybody, he goes on ‘benders’ which includes our DDs 1st xmas and bday and doesn’t come home for a day or 2. He has on a 3 occasions charged at me and pulled my hair and pushed me.
After a few days he is always sorry, he promises to get counselling etc and we go back to a ‘happy’ house that lasts for max a few weeks.
Why can I not fathom the courage to leave him? He is leaving for Spain in the morning to see his mother as I told him I’m looking for somewhere to leave as I’m not happy and he said he will give me space. So why the hell am I ALREADY having doubts? I never want to have sex with him even though he pushes it on me 5 times a week and more!!
I love this man, but I don’t want to be with him. So why can I not leave? I think I’m scared that I will regret leaving as even though he sounds like a complete idiot, he has a very good side that I do love. I may not find anybody for years and will be alone struggling with a 1 year old.
One day I’m a strong woman that is leaving and the next I miss him already and need him.
Love and children make leaving very difficult :(
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Relationships
Why can I not leave my DP
19 replies
JSweetpea1234 · 14/07/2020 22:13
OP posts:
FartingNora ·
15/07/2020 06:20
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