Hi All,
This is going to be a long one so apologies in advance.
I met my current boyfriend in August last year, he was everything I ever dreamed of, tall, dark, handsome, replied to my messages, sensitive the lot.
And then came the problems. When I met him, he'd been split from his wife of 10 years for a year. Between the ex wife and myself, he went out on a date with a mutual friend of his friend. The date lived in Scotland (we live in Bristol) so quite a fair distance so they had plenty of time to get to know each other beforehand. During this time (before he even met her) they had everything planned. The dogs name, the kids names, the wedding venue etc. He had already booked flights to be with her at Christmas and was already planning to go and live in Scotland with her. Safe to say, the date didn't go well and she sacked him off.
Then came me. The first dates were brilliant, we really clicked and had a good time. Then, about 2 weeks in, I went round his house and he was in absolute floods of tears because things hadn't worked out with this date. I sat with him, comforted him, let him get it all out and in the end, he wanted to keep trying things with me. To be honest, I probably should have left at this point.
In October, we went to Cardiff on the train, and again, he started crying at a particular train station because it was the last place that this date had dropped him off. Strange, I know.
To cut a long story short, 6-7 months in to our relationship and he's still talking to this girl he went on the date with. To the point where he was constantly checking her Facebook for pictures etc. I understand that they can be friends but given their history, I wasn't convinced that he still didn't have feelings for her. I told him how I felt about it and he agreed and said he would stop talking to her. He didn't.
3 months later, he makes a big deal about blocking her on Facebook/Instagram and deleting her number as he feels it's best for our relationship. Again, I find that this is a lie and although I can't find evidence that he's spoken to her, he's still gone through and liked stuff on her page.
I like to think I'm a pretty reasonable person but even I feel now that this is pushing the limits. I'm sick and tired of being in a relationship where I constantly feel like second best, where my feelings aren't taken seriously and nothing ever changes.
He says to me that I'm the only one he wants to be with but I can't help but think that his behaviour suggests otherwise.
I was just looking for some impartial advice as I don't really know what to do anymore.
Many thanks for your help
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
Help! I'm stuck
applesaregood91 · 30/06/2020 12:28
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.