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Relationships

Elopement stories please

6 replies

NewMumma1819 · 11/05/2020 13:05

DP and I have pretty much come to the conclusion that we are probably going to go down the elopement route. Not go away to do it just go to our local registry office when lock down is finished and get married (thanks to lots of lovely mumsnetters giving us advise!) with just 2 witnesses and our DS. Has anyone here done this simply, without all the frills of going abroad/fancy venue? If so would you mind telling me about it? Smile

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AmeliaTaylor · 11/05/2020 17:38

Kinda, though we had six guests (our parents and siblings) so not sure if that counts?

We wanted to be married before having a baby but didn’t want to delay TTC and had a lot on our plates with buying a house so we decided to try and then marry while pregnant. Got pregnant, engaged at four months pregnant and had our wedding day at six months pregnant. Got engaged on the Sunday, rang up the register office to give notice and choose the next available date on the Monday.

It was perfect, our dream wedding! My dress was £18 from Primark. Our rings cost less than £100 each. We showed up, got married, then went for lunch after at a cafe we like so the guests hadn’t travelled just for a half an hour ceremony and been asked to go straight back home again. The only thing we really put any planning into was choosing the three songs for the ceremony.

We were home for 6pm snuggled up watching tv together, married and happy :) spent about £400 total including the fees. Neither of us cared about a fancy wedding and we couldn’t think of much worse than spending money we could use for the house and baby on a celebration. Each to their own but for us it was really just about being legally husband and wife. It was just perfect. It felt quite surreal as we hadn’t done any of the traditional stuff like hen or stags, no bridesmaids or best men, no rehearsal, husband didn’t decide what he was gonna wear until the morning right before we set off. I absolutely loved that our baby was there with us, somersaulting inside me as we said our vows. We aren’t religious and nobody was expecting or pressuring us to marry before a baby, it was just something we both knew we wanted so we cracked on with it.

Meanwhile I have friends who said why not wait until the baby is here and then plan a proper wedding (who got engaged before or during pregnancy themselves) who’ve ended up with four and five year old kids and still aren’t married. I think if we’d not got on with it during pregnancy it’d have been hard to find the time and money to do it in the first few years of a new baby. So I’m really glad we did it this way around. It never felt like a massive deal, just a logical step in our relationship. As romantic as we can both be, it was very much a legal thing primarily. I wouldn’t have felt comfortable reducing my hours at work once mat leave ended and compromising my income, pension and savings without being married.

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NewMumma1819 · 11/05/2020 18:22

@AmeliaTaylor - that sounds wonderful! DP's mum doesn't understand us wanting to elope, sees it as a thing that should involve everyone. My parents are fine with it. We would ask friends/strangers/mumsnetters to attend as witnesses as asking select family members would cause more agro than getting married is worth!

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Likethebattle · 11/05/2020 18:48

We did it, we booked it througb a specialist company who supply a venue, accommodation and witnesses. Our witnesses were the piper and photographer (all included in cost). If you google CREAR wee weddings. They have a larger venue if you want a bigger wedding or the smaller cottage for eloping.

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TheYellowOfTheEgg · 11/05/2020 21:23

My sister got married in a civil wedding with the groom's brothers as witnesses. She didn't tell any of her family for a YEAR. We were surprised, but we're not bothered by weddings and live in different countries anyway so we weren't offended.

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pinacoladalover · 11/05/2020 21:59

Eloped 2 years ago with my dear husband who I am with for 15 years. Didn't want the big wedding nor did we tell anyone until we got back. It was not cheap as we did it in Costa Rica but we wanted to go on holiday anyway so we made holiday/wedding/honeymoon in the same time which suited us perfectly. My dress was a Coast white summer dress costed about £80 I wore a flowers crown on my head and the ceremony itself £650 with all the legalities and certificate in English. It was on the beach it was just us it was perfect (almost if you don't count the extreme heat). We finished the day with a sunset cruise sipping pina coladas on the deck and sharing with another couple from Texas who did exactly same thing as us one day before us! Bliss! Good luck whatever you choose and congratulations!

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Impropriety · 11/05/2020 22:08

We did it.... local registry office and just had our two witnesses there and our 15 month old son. DH’s parents had already passed away and mine were divorced and can’t behave themselves. My father is an alcoholic and my mother did not treat me well at the time, she hadn’t wanted me to have my son at age 23 and she didn’t come and see me and the baby when he was born.

We had family photos in the morning and the marriage took place in the afternoon. It was great but DS cried all the way through! Afterwards my friend (one of the witnesses) had our DS overnight while we went to London, went for a meal, went to a comedy club and had a night in a swish hotel.

For our ten year anniversary we took the kids to Vegas and renewed our vows in a very fun ceremony... so we kind of feel like we did it all over again.

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