Was my fiancée inappropriate?

Haz465 · 2019-11-21 17:58:22

About twelve years before we met, my fiancée hooked up on one occasion with someone he’d known for a few months. It involved a funny story, namely that they had sex in a car and suddenly people started knocking on the window and they realised it was a dogging spot ... he told me this story early on in our relationship as one of his funny memories. A few weeks ago, this girl messaged him out of the blue to see how he was getting on. The last time they spoke was about two years ago (before I had met my fiancée) and I can see from their messages over the years that they stayed in touch after they had hooked up on what seems to be a pretty platonic basis - just general chat every few months/years about their lives and work. When she messaged him a few weeks ago out of the blue, my fiancée replied saying something along the lines of ‘lovely surprise to hear from you after all these years, how have you been’ and saying he is reminded of her when he sees a sign for her hometown on the motorway. She replied saying she is reminded of him whenever she goes past the ‘x spot’ which is where they had sex. She then made some general comments about her work/life and asked him about his work. My fiancée replied explaining what he does for a living nowadays and, in relation to her comment about X spot, he said ‘thanks for naming it, this will bolster the recurring nightmares I have about those scallies knocking on the door!’ She then asked him if he wanted to meet up for a coffee and chat for old times sake, but he didn’t reply and the conversation was left at that. He is generally very transparent with his phone and I saw these messages when he was scrolling through it in front of me. I asked him about them and he said that he hadn’t meant anything flirtatious by it, he was simply replying to someone who had initiated contact with him, and was reminiscing about a funny story that had happened many years ago. He said it would be different if he had been talking about how great the sex was or how he missed it or something like that, but that he just saw it as a funny memory. He said he didn’t respond to the invite for coffee as he thinks it would be inappropriate to meet up with someone he once had a fling with when he is now engaged. In every other sense he is very open and loyal and isn’t someone who hides something from me. Am I right to feel that these messages are inappropriate from his side, or am I being paranoid?

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We're taking this down for the OP now as they have some concerns in real life.