Dear All,
I’m not exactly what advice I’m looking for- what questions I would like answered.
My fiancé was emotionally and financially abusive and controlling. He took my money and left me with little; he threatened me and called me many hurtful and cruel names which were disportionate to the ‘crime’. I thought I was stubborn and he had a difficult childhood so I gave him sympathy and patience and lots more besides. He was so demanding and draining.
We got engaged and spent an extravagant amount on the ring and made a huge fuss over the engagement with my family. After he soon became more violent and cruel. I wanted to leave but I wasn’t quite strong enough yet- I was slowly building to it though.
He announced, out of the blue that he wanted to break up. We had a joint lease do he said we could share the place but I couldn’t stay there so I went back home. He wanted the ring of course but I refused to return it. He also asked me to give him 2 days notice before I collected my stuff. I went by the flat unannounced to collect something small and I found another woman’s things in sling my belongings. Her discarded knickers and clothes were strewn on a ruffled bed- the exact same sheets I left 3 weeks before while our engagement cards still decorated the nearby windowsill. I feel physically sick. How could anyone be such an absolute disgusting monster? I never encountered anyone or anything like this before. My family and I have values that are diametrically opposed to this sort of behaviour. I can’t tell them the full extent of what he’s done - it would break their hearts. I don’t know how I’ll get through it. I found a note from her to him signed ‘I love you’. How long was he seeing her? Why propose if he didn’t mean it? Why didn’t I break it off with him first? He was an abuser, so why am I the one crying? Why can’t I just celebrate that I’m free?
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Relationships
Abusive, narcissistic ex
7 replies
Clytemnestra1 · 19/04/2018 11:32
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