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How do you explain LC/NC to young children?

(5 Posts)
MonkeyJumping Mon 13-Nov-17 14:20:07

DH is very low contact with FIL and no contact with all other relatives. FIL is visiting our area soon and will be meeting our almost 3 yr old for the first time.

DS knows my parents but I don't think he understands they are my parents if you see what I mean. He's never asked about DH's family.

So how do we explain who this grandad is and why we never see him?

Joysmum Mon 13-Nov-17 14:37:00

I think you’ll be surprised. Children see their family dynamics, whatever they may be, as normal.

You don’t live near to your family and that’s a good enough reason. You’re not best friends with your DH’s family so don’t spend much time with them. That’ll do for a 3 year old.

MonkeyJumping Mon 13-Nov-17 16:52:38

So just "he lives far away" and no more explanation? That is true actually.

Thank you for the input.

mindutopia Mon 13-Nov-17 19:39:31

If you plan to have them in your lives and see them, I don't think you really need to explain it. Just introduce them as who they are. I don't think that would seem weird for a 3 year old. Lots of families are very spread out now and it's very normal not to see them often or to be meeting new family members at this age. I think it seems weird to you because you know the back story, but it won't to him.

It's much more complicated to explain the shit to LC/NC. We've had to go NC with my MIL/step-FIL after they have been involved in my dd's life for many years. That is painful and difficult to explain as they just up and disappeared, pretty much died as far as she is concerned, which is challenging to talk about. But if he just hasn't met them, I would just introduce them for who they are and make a nice day of it and leave it at that.

mindutopia Mon 13-Nov-17 19:40:37

*shift. Anyway, it can be pretty shit sometimes too, so freudian slip maybe.

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