End of the line?

[shortbreadsharon]

Firstly I'm sorry if this is all over the place I just can't get my head to make any sense of this. My husband and I have been together 12 years and married 5 years this Wednesday. We have 2 beautiful kids, an 8 yr old DD and a soon to be 4 yr old DS (next Monday). I've only just discovered I have Pcos and so can now understand how we struggled to have our children.

Anyway since day one husband has been very flirty and over the years I've discovered situations like him texting ex gfs. Or not long after we'd moved into our first flat together, late at night his head chef came battering on our window as I lay in bed terrified wanting to fight him, seemingly his wife and my then fb had been carrying on at work and talking on fb etc. I was too chicken to go ask the very drunk husband the full story and so accepted my then bf excuse of it was harmless flirting to get them through a shift. Fast forward a cpl year to a week before our wedding and I caught him PMing with an ex and she was in the middle of reminiscing about a certain night they'd had and I went nuts, stupidly shutting it down before seeing just how guilty he was. After that we got married and we got iPhones and then his phone became this private thing and he became addicted to his phone.

He's a chef and so is out the door dropping DD at school then he's at work from then until 9pm/10pm 5 days a week. On his two days off he just wants to sit on his phone, which is never out his hand or pocket. I do the housework, the entertaining of the kids etc he's just not interested unless it's on his phone. It's gotten so ridiculous I need to text him to get out the bathroom because he gets lost in it.

So last week, his company was doing a management away day thing where they went to Newcastle for an overnight. He left the house at 6.20 am as they had to have breakfast and a meeting before they went on the bus. He arrived at 1.30pm and I seen his name light up on fb. No text to his worrier of a wife to say he'd arrived safe. Then I kept the kids up to 8pm waiting on a phone call which didn't come to say goodnight. I got a rubbish text at 8.30 but I wasn't interested as I'd just put my upset DS to bed who'd wanted to speak to daddy. Now a cpl of days later I find he's been snap chatting with a girl more than have our age. Of course when asked he drained of any colour began to deny it, I said I had proof and he quickly changed to I wasn't doing anything wrong. Next thing I know he's deleted snapchat, deleted fb but surely if there was nothing wrong you don't delete these things. So I am thinking about calling it a day but was hoping he would want to talk it try and sort it but it's like he's avoiding me. Staying downstairs until I'm asleep, careful not to wake me when leaving. I don't really know why I'm putting this out there as I know ultimately it'll be the two of us to decide but I'm just looking for advice, what you do?

I do love my husband and I think he loves me but I don't know if the problem is he's not attracted to me anymore.

[Brahms3rdracket]

From what you've said he's pretty much cheated, or tried to, throughout your entire relationship. He's now ignoring you because he knows you'll simply let it go each time he's caught out and assumed that's going to happen again this time. Of course he's hiding stuff when deleting the aps, otherwise he would show you the innocent messages to clear his name.

Question is are you going to ignore it and let him carry on or are you going to confront things this time?

[Adora10]

Stopped reading after the first few sentences, he's a serial cheat and is trying to get into every woman's pants possible, you are also underplaying his vile behaviour, time to call it a day.

It's not about attraction, it's about him being a cheat, a liar and taking every opportunity possible to make a complete arse out your relationship, and he's getting away with it.

[AndBandPlayedScotlandTheBrave]

End if the line? Yes. He has a wandering eye...and other parts too from the sounds of it. Enough is enough.

[thestamp]

It doesn't sound like it's ever been much of a relationship has it?

I think you'd have a chance of meeting a proper partner if you call this a day now...